Shirt.Woot : One Shirt, No Shoes, No Service (SM)

Trendy mall stores have made it impossible to tell the difference between someone who is actually a fan of a band and someone who just spent $30 on a Ramones shirt because that one guy on that one show wore one. Since we need new, avant-garde ways of showing our disdain for those slightly behind the zeitgeist bell curve, use this week's theme to craft shirt designs based on, inspired by, and reinterpreting the names of famous bands. You can go for the obvious take (guy with a radio where his head should be?) or the slightly more obscure (a single-engine high altitude reconnaissance plane?), but the shirt should focus on the name entirely. And while we're not going to judge your taste in music (Mayor named John?), we are going to question the validity of any band that can only be found via some obscure myspace page with 10 friends. Keep it real, yo. That means:

No copyrighted imagery. If the band already did it, we don't want to see it again.

No videogame references.

No bunnies.

No text.

-Edits, for clarification:-

No celebrity likeness, either. You're reinvisioning the band NAME, not showing us the band.

Band names, not performer names.

Derby #137: Luck closed for voting at noon today. Three of these designs will go on sale one at a time over the next three days - the rest will go down in near-miss history. Click on each picture below to see that entry's page, with a fuller view of the design. The final nine, in no particular order...

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You guys! I’ve got a great idea!

Oh, wait. Lost it. Dang.

I guess we should be glad that inventions really don’t grow on trees. I mean, if all you had to do was water and feed a tree with idea after idea, day after day, to produce the next world changing device, everybody would be running around with things like High Jump Boots and Freeze Rays and stuff. It’s certainly make all the time I’ve spent working on a weather machine with which to bring the world’s populace to its knees until they had crowned me Planetary Ruler all for not.

Come to think of it, now I kinda wish inventions DID grow on trees. Mwa ha.

Wear this shirt: when your struggling for your next great idea.

Don’t wear this shirt: if robotic birds have freaked you out ever since you first watched Clash Of The Titans.

This shirt tells the world: “The Tree Of Invention must be refreshed from time to time with the ideas of SCIENCE.”

We call this color: Necessity Is The Mother Of Grass

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It goes by too fast to be much of use as a lesson. But this time-lapse screen-capture video of the making of a book cover design is still a fascinating look over the shoulder of a pro designer. And although it took six hours to make the design, watching the video will only cost you two minutes.

(As seen at BoingBoing.)

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Milk, Milk, Lemonade

‘Round the corner, love is made

Some things just go together. Like whiskey and vermouth. Or peanut butter and jelly. Or peanut butter and chocolate. Or peanut butter and banana. Boy, peanut butter gets around, doesn’t it? It wasn’t until just now that we realized what a whore peanut butter is.

It’s nice to have a natural match. But equally nice—or maybe even nicer—is to find yourself in an unexpected hook-up that nonetheless works. Here’s to odd couples! To Murtaugh and Riggs! To jalapeño and chocolate! To Rachel and Finn! To Bono and U.S. Treasury Secretary Paul O’Neill!

Because what’s more delightful than an unlikely pair?

Just about nothing, that’s what.

Wear this shirt: after smelling it to make sure it hasn’t gone bad.

Don’t wear this shirt: unless it’s been properly refrigerated.

This shirt tells the world: “TEACH LACTOSE TOLERANCE”

We call this color: Royally Cute Royal Blue

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Man, "In addition to your radishes, I will take this" got so much love in the forums (and in our office) we didn't think it'd go down like this. Think of the Children displaces It's a Trap! for the number one seed right out of the gate. The rest of the noobs are going to need a little more help. Could this be the sign of an extended run for our new numero uno shirt? Find out at our Reckoning page, or better yet: go ahead and influence the standings yourself by making a purchase.

And oh yeah, Nevermore is still hangin' tough.

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Reach inside our magic laundry dryer and pull out a shirt design from the past! Not the real past, though; an idealized, imaginary past, like Spartacus: Blood and Sand without the bare breasts. These Honorable Mentions for Derby #136: the New Vintage give us the feeling that somewhere, in an alternate universe, somebody's wondering where their favorite t-shirts disappeared to...

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Rockin’ = Not Knockin’

There’s a time in every person’s life when they must decide for themselves which way to go.

Will they choose the route of the child, forever wide-eyed and innocent? The child can never truly become cynical, after all, and meets each day with a magical joy. The child can travel in a box with ease, for a box is the transport of the imagination! With paint and with an airbrush, the child can dream up a world of wizards and dragons and mostly women fighting barbarians on the moon and then paint it on the blank canvas that the box signifies. The path of the child is one of dreams and glory!

Or will they choose the path of the adult? The adult needs a car to get from place to place, since time is of the essence. He needs the room to hold important papers, and a good sound system to keep track of the latest music, and maybe even a big backseat for naps and gettin’ lucky. The car is a sign that the adult can do as he pleases whenever he pleases, maybe even at full speed!

There are two paths and no more. Every person must decide for themselves what… what… what is that majestic creature over there? It’s doing 75, but has a painting of a naked unicorn on the side! I… I must have it! I must! Do you hear, world? There is a better way! There is a better way!

Wear this shirt: on Vanic Monday. Hey, stop groaning, it’s our I-don’t-have-to-run-day.

Don’t wear this shirt: backwards. It won’t be as funny if everyone thinks you’re just talking about boxcars.

This shirt tells the world: “You Probably Think This Shirt Is About You. Don’t You? Don’t You? Don’t You?”

We call this color: ‘Cause Like A Princess She Was Layin’ There/Moonlight Dancin’ Off Her Hair/She Woke Up And Took Me By The Hand/We Made Love In My Chevy Van/And That’s All White With Me

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Forget some stuffy old Academy of Arts and Sciences; the real Oscars happen every week right here, at the Reckoning! Nevermore is closing in on a two year run on the chart; that's as good an equivalent to "Best Picture" as any, right? The Cthulhu meme might be eternal, but the shirt wasn't. Snag it today before it sinks back into the briny deep and gets permanently retired tonight at midnight! Ironically, Procrastinate and The Apathy Coalition put some effort in and rose up in the standings. Check out the shuffling and buy your favorite soon-to-be-gone-palindrome-shirt over at our Reckoning page!

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Look guys, I know we’ve got a lot going on.

I’m just saying I haven’t been feeling very good either since that thing with Kane.

It’s just that I woke up the other day and Lambert’s cat was sleeping on my face. It really freaked me out, and I’ve had this terrible stomach ache ever since. Shut up! I am NOT a hypochondriac!

Okay, sure, I’m freaked out about that thing. I think we ALL are. But seriously guys, my stomach is in knots! I keep hearing this muffled purring sound, and- Hey is that a cheeseburger?

I can haz?

OH GOD NO! AAARAARARRARRRRRGGHGGHGOMGWTFROFLLULZ!

Wear this shirt: While responding to distress signals originating from nearby planetoids.

Don’t wear this shirt: If you recently woke to discover a dead facehugger lying on the ground nearby. You’re about to ruin your shirt.

This shirt tells the world: “This shirt plays on men’s fear of pregnancy and childbirth.”

We call this color: FaceHeather Gray

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