Welcome Woot-Off fans: a battle is raging between our older shirts on
the Reckoning chart, where only the strongest-selling survive. Buy them and join the fray.
You want to feel weirder about vegetables than you ever have in your life? Check out the Wikipedia page for broccoli,
the way you might if you were tasked with writing sales copy for a
broccoli-themed t-shirt. You’ll find phrases like “abundant fleshy
flower heads” and “a thick, edible stalk” and “a purple cast to the
tips of the flower buds”. Is it just us, or does this conjure images of
a Gigeresque grotesquerie, a psychosexual horror whose inhuman orifices
drip with mystery fluids? Doesn’t it sound less like a wholesome
vegetable and more like some unspeakable multi-gendered abomination
straight out of Naked Lunch?
Oh, OK. Guess it’s just us, then. Forget we said anything. Broccoli, yum.
This shirt was designed by: Amanda “cheesesandwich” Barker, graphic designer, belle of Detroit, and co-creator of our popular, controversial Row Vs. Wade
t-shirt. She says this shirt was “inspired by the always lovely Ella
Matt”. We hope we got those names in the right order. If not, please
accept our apologies, Matt Ella.
Wear this shirt: to every barbecue you ever go to. That way, when everybody else dies of heart disease and E. coli, at least you’ll know you tried to warn them.
Don’t wear this shirt:
if you’re going out on a date with spinach. I don’t know what it is
with those two, but the minute you get them in the room together, the
claws come out.
This shirt tells the world: “Smiling broccoli faces don't always have to be creepy.”
We call this color: Broccoli Has A Lot More Nutritional Value Than Olives. Too Bad About The Taste.
Design Placement: Centered
Design Size:
3X – S: 10” x 12.57”
WXL- K4: 7.5” x 9.43”
Pantone Color(s): 352C – 335C – Black
Please check American Apparel's sizing chart for men, for women or children before you order. The Woot Tee, constructed by American Apparel, follows their classic closer-fitting style. If you prefer a baggier look, order a larger size. If there is not a larger size, consider starting a belly-hanging-out trend.
