Shirt.Woot

Keep your day-to-day mundane real existence out of here.

Let the fun begin . . .

Thought for the day.... Gawd, how I love logic in its purest form. In a number of carefully controlled trials, scientists have demonstrated that if we drink 1 liter of water each day, at the end of the year we would have absorbed more than 1 kilo of Escherichia coli (E. Coli) bacteria found in feces. In other words, we are consuming 1 kilo of Poop. However, we do not run that risk when drinking wine (or rum, whiskey, beer or other liquor) because alcohol has to go through a purification process of boiling, filtering and/or fermenting. Remember: Water = Poop; Wine = Health. Therefore, it's better to drink wine and talk stupid, than to drink water and be full of s#it .

AZGman wrote:Keep your day-to-day mundane real existence out of here.

Let the fun begin . . .

Thought for the day.... Gawd, how I love logic in its purest form. In a number of carefully controlled trials, scientists have demonstrated that if we drink 1 liter of water each day, at the end of the year we would have absorbed more than 1 kilo of Escherichia coli (E. Coli) bacteria found in feces. In other words, we are consuming 1 kilo of Poop. However, we do not run that risk when drinking wine (or rum, whiskey, beer or other liquor) because alcohol has to go through a purification process of boiling, filtering and/or fermenting. Remember: Water = Poop; Wine = Health. Therefore, it's better to drink wine and talk stupid, than to drink water and be full of crap .

I knew I liked you!!!

AZGman wrote:Keep your day-to-day mundane real existence out of here.

Let the fun begin . . .

Thought for the day.... Gawd, how I love logic in its purest form. In a number of carefully controlled trials, scientists have demonstrated that if we drink 1 liter of water each day, at the end of the year we would have absorbed more than 1 kilo of Escherichia coli (E. Coli) bacteria found in feces. In other words, we are consuming 1 kilo of Poop. However, we do not run that risk when drinking wine (or rum, whiskey, beer or other liquor) because alcohol has to go through a purification process of boiling, filtering and/or fermenting. Remember: Water = Poop; Wine = Health. Therefore, it's better to drink wine and talk stupid, than to drink water and be full of crap .

here's to your health then!

AZGman wrote:Keep your day-to-day mundane real existence out of here.
Therefore, it's better to drink wine and talk stupid, than to drink water and be full of crap .

LOL - Where is that Elvis wine when I need it?

Lynnzoi wrote:

here's to your health then!

I lift my glass to ya, Lynnie!!

A golfer, now into his golden years, had a lifelong ambition to play the 17th hole at Sawgrass in Ponte Verde, Fla. exactly the way the pros do it.

The pros drive the ball out over the water onto the small green that is on a small spit of land. It was something he had tried hundreds of times without success. His ball had always fallen short, into the water.

Because of this, he never used a new ball on this particular hole. He always picked out one that had a cut or a nick, as did many other "average" golfers when negotiating very challenging holes.

Recently he went to Sawgrass to try again.

When he came to the fateful hole, he teed up an old cut ball as usual, and said a silent prayer.

However, before he could hit it, a powerful voice from above seemed to be booming out from the clouds, saying,

"WAIT...REPLACE THAT OLD BALL WITH A BRAND NEW ONE."

He complied, with some slight misgiving, despite the fact that this same force seemed to be implying that he was going to finally achieve his lifelong ambition.

As he stepped up to the tee once more, the voice came down again,

"WAIT. STEP BACK... TAKE A PRACTICE SWING."

So he stepped back and took a practice swing, certain now that this heavenly force was going to make his dream come true.

The voice boomed out again, "TAKE ANOTHER PRACTICE SWING."

Dutifully, he did. He stopped expectantly and waited...

A long silence followed.......

Then the voice boomed again:

"USE THE OLD BALL."

Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench talking........ and
one blonde says to the other, "Which do you think is farther away.........
Florida or the moon?"
The other blonde turns and says "Helloooooooooo, can you see Florida.....?????"

Lynnzoi wrote:Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench talking........ and
one blonde says to the other, "Which do you think is farther away.........
Florida or the moon?"
The other blonde turns and says "Helloooooooooo, can you see Florida.....?????"

<chortle>

Ready to get silly, gir'frien'???

AZGman wrote:

<chortle>

Ready to get silly, gir'frien'???

get? already there darlin!

Lynnzoi wrote:

get? already there darlin!

So, have ya heard the one about the one ya haven't heard?

AZGman wrote:

So, have ya heard the one about the one ya haven't heard?

can't say that I have.......

have you?

Lynnzoi wrote:

can't say that I have.......

have you?

If I had, you would have; and since you haven't, neither have I . . .

AZGman wrote:

If I had, you would have; and since you haven't, neither have I . . .

damn


and I bet it was funny, too

Every day there are news reports about more deaths. Every night on TV there are photos of death and destruction. Why are we still there? - We occupied this land, which we had to take by force, but it causes us nothing but trouble. Why are we still there?
-
Many of our children go there and never come back. Why are we still there?
-
Their government was unstable, and they had loopy leadership. Why are we still there?
-
Many of their people are uncivilized. Why are we still there?
-
The place is subject to natural disasters, that we are supposed to bail them out from. Why are we still there?
-
There are more than 1000 religious sects, which we do not understand. Why are we still there?
-
Their folkways, foods and fads are unfathomable to ordinary Americans. Why are we still there?
-
We can't even secure the borders. Why are we still there?
-
They are billions of dollars in debt and it will cost billions more to rebuild, which we can't afford. Why are we still there?
-
It is becoming very clear ... SOONER OR LATER WE MUST PULL OUT OF CALIFORNIA

The MexiCalifornicaton of America?

AZGman wrote:The MexiCalifornicaton of America?

s'ok, as long as they bring the tequila!

If California were all that progressive, it's governor would be the president of Mexico.

AZGman wrote:If California were all that progressive, it's governor would be the president of Mexico.

I only have one thing to say to that

Lynnzoi wrote:

I only have one thing to say to that

Thank you, Arnold Rivera-Diego-Chavezneggger . . .

Well, kiddo . . . looks like it's you and me that are gonna have to lift this barge and tote that bale . . .

AZGman wrote:Well, kiddo . . . looks like it's you and me that are gonna have to lift this barge and tote that bale . . .

Hooowah!!

AZGman wrote:If California were all that progressive, it's governor would be the president of Mexico.

Want us to tell them something while we're there next week?
Ooh, Better take my passport for when I want to get back into the country!

Uncorked wrote:
Want us to tell them something while we're there next week?
Ooh, Better take my passport for when I want to get back into the country!

Take your trunks; you can always wade across the Rio Grande . . . you'll probably have more rights than the rest of us.

did anyone get........









a shrubbery???

Lynnzoi wrote:did anyone get........









a shrubbery???

Ni!!!!!

AZGman wrote:

Ni!!!!!

Ni??

NI! NI! NI!!

Lynnzoi wrote:

Ni??

NI! NI! NI!!

Nu?

AZGman wrote:

Nu?

no......



Ni!

Lynnzoi wrote:

no......



Ni!

herring!!!

Ekke, Ekke, Ekke, Ekke, Ptang, Zoo Ping!

Lynnzoi wrote:Ekke, Ekke, Ekke, Ekke, Ptang, Zoo Ping!

(The Knights Who Until Recently Said Ni)

Lynnzoi wrote:

(The Knights Who Until Recently Said Ni)

(you) soiled (your) armor.

AZGman wrote:

(you) soiled (your) armor.

bring up the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch

Crap . . . another real life thread . . . if they all had the real lives they spend time here talking about, why are they here?

Lynnzoi wrote:

bring up the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch

One . . . two . . . - four . . .

AZGman wrote:

One . . . two . . . - four . . .

no ......... three!!!!!!!!

AZGman wrote:Crap . . . another real life thread . . . if they all had the real lives they spend time here talking about, why are they here?

and why are you interrupting our thread pissin and moanin about it????

Lynnzoi wrote:

and why are you interrupting our thread pissin and moanin about it????

A broken thread...the fabric of space/time is unraveling!!!

Uncorked wrote:
A broken thread...the fabric of space/time is unraveling!!!

I ain't so sure it was ever raveled in here!

Lynnzoi wrote:

I ain't so sure it was ever raveled in here!

spaghetti theory?...