This shirt looks best when lit by fireworks, so pay the extra $5 for overnight shipping to wear it on July 4th.
What happens before you’re revolting? Come on, come on, it’s an easy
question, we’ve all gone drinking before. What happens before you’re
revolting? That’s right, you’re sitting in the car with all your
friends discussing “The Plan”.
Maybe “The Plan” involves potato skins, beer and the NBA Finals.
Maybe “The Plan” involves six different bars and a highly trained
monkey. Or maybe “The Plan” involves the creation of an entirely new
country that the world never expected. It was the former of these that
bound our founding fathers together on July 2nd, 1776. Hang on, former
means the last one, doesn’t it? Because we slept a lot in U.S. History
but we’re pretty sure no one ever shot off fireworks about potato skins
and monkeys.
Anyway, it was today that the original 12
Colonies voted on the Declaration of Independence and set us on our
path. Without the events of July 2nd, there would be no Liberty Bell.
There would be no Bald Eagle, no Signing Hand, no Anchor, no Lightning,
no Waves Of Freedom Crashing Against The Boundless Boundary Of Space.
And it’s all those things that make this shirt look so good!
Imagine
how different our United Colonies might be with power still in the
hands of London. We’d probably all be speaking English, making fun of
France, and watching the same two families fight for control of the
government for about two decades straight. Thank God we avoided a fate
like that, right?
This shirt was designed by: our buddy Jimiyo, who brought us the pirate freebooter shirt Dead Man’s Chest.
Remember, the difference between prison and knighthood might be a
single letter of marque. And speaking of letters of marque, Jimiyo
wants you to know that you can pay 20% less for his shirts at DBH by using the referral code “jimiyo”. He’s always lookin’ out for ya.
Wear this shirt:
because that eagle is ready to hit someone in the face with a ship.
Look at him. Somebody’s gonna get a snow-brig in the eye and nobody can
stop it. That’s America, pal. WHAMMO!
Don’t wear this shirt:
if you’re going to start counting the masts on a cartoon ship just to
fight with us about the description. We didn’t even know what “latter”
meant a few paragraphs ago, remember? Every day we don’t accidentally
poke our own eyes out with a fork at lunch is one more little miracle
the Universe is wasting on us. Only in America! If this was Mexico we’d
be lying by the side of the road praying for Zorro to appear.
This shirt tells the world: “I’m probably not from Canada.”
We call this color: Navy-gle
Placement: Centered
Printed Size:
3X – M: 13” x 13.08”
S – WS: 9.75” x 9.81”
Pantone Color(s): – White – 453 C – 7406 C – Cool Gray 9 C
Please check American Apparel's sizing chart for men or for women before you order. The Woot Tee, constructed by American Apparel, follows their classic closer-fitting style. If you prefer a baggier look, order a larger size. If there is not a larger size, consider starting a belly-hanging-out trend.
