After the Party

by wootbot

Welcome to Dragonville Municipal Waste Systems

1st place in Derby #275: I Recycle, with 344 votes!

Welcome to the neighborhood, current [Cave #304] occupant! We at Dragonville Municipal Waste Systems are happy to be your new waste disposal provider. We're sure you'll enjoy unparalleled service for all your human-knight disposal needs.

Before you begin disposing of your human remains, we would like to cover a few guidelines.

  • Always recycle steel, bronze, and tin armor. However, splint mail, hide armor, and studded leather armor should NOT be placed in recycling bins. A useful mnemonic device: "If it's shiny, recycle it, spiny! If it's brown, burn it down."
  • Please separate your humans into their appropriate bins. These are: Hair, skin, bones, organs, and gunk. Remember: Gunk is mostly red, and organs are gross looking. Teeth and bones can go in the same bin.
  • Human garbage collection is once every two weeks. If your bin begins to smell, scorch it with your fire breath. This should halt any decomposition that may be occurring.

Thanks again, and welcome to the neighborhood.

-DMWS

Wear this shirt: to protect against chafing right before you're slain.

Don't wear this shirt: on alternating Tuesdays, Wednesdays, or Saturdays.

This shirt tells the world: "Grisly is the new cute."

We call this color: Aw man, the raccoons scattered spleens all over the asphalt again.