Maybe "Athletic" Is Overstating It
OK, I'm ready to get into the spirit of this "soccer" thing! I'll just think of it as chess with an inflated bladder!
Perhaps if I learn to appreciate these "sports" on the level of strategy and tactics, I can finally relate to the others. Once I master the basic rules and moves and so forth, I'm sure I'll find a whole new level of intellectual engagement every bit as engrossing as my tabletop simulation of the Napoleonic campaigns. I'll develop a keener appreciation for the various skills involved in the game, and learn to appreciate complex feats of physical acumen as much as I appreciate an elegant mathematical equation. A new era for me starts today, with my embrace of the world athletic, the rugged sphere of physical competi-
What? THAT'S the field? I'm supposed to run up and down THAT for 90 minutes? Sigh... I'll be over here reading. Again.