Coffee Levels Critical

by Wootbot

1st place in Derby #50: Energy, with 739 votes!

Today’s shirt is a subtle, yet aromatic blend of wit and comfort. The design was first sketched on a legal pad, then torn up and fed to small Peruvian bats, which then digested the design over a period of two weeks. The bats used their natural process of peptic deconstruction to leave the fibers soft and pliable, and the fibers were then combined with just a dash of superiority extracted from the mouth of the oldest bee in Rome. This mélange was then scraped into an ivory mug, where it was made to feel bad for participating in the death of an elephant. After settling, the dry fibers were then woven into the final shirt, and participated in a two day discussion in the role of Lo-Fi in the current underground music scene. This shirt will most certainly work with a Mac.

This shirt was designed by: Jack31081. In 1337 that spells “ELOBI” which means he’s either a Jedi or thinks Jeff Lynne swings both ways. Hey, you never know, Jack, it was a wild time for everybody back then.

Wear this shirt: if you’re hitting on the barista. “Hey, did you notice my shirt?” is always a surefire pickup line. It makes you look dangerous and cool.

Don’t wear this shirt: if you work at Starbucks. Although maybe they’d let you get away with it if you burned the edges.

This shirt tells the world: “Do you have a skinny iced mocha frappe with cinnamon outlet so my laptop can enjoy it here too?”

We call this color: Cappuccino Brown. Which, coincidentally, is also the name of our favorite blacksploitation movie.

Placement: Upper Right Side

Printed Size:
3X – M: 2.5” x 3.34”
S – WS: 1.87” x 2.5”

Pantone Color(s): – White – 362 C – Warm Gray 3 C – Cool Gray 5 C

Please check American Apparel's sizing chart for men or for women before you order. The Woot Tee, constructed by American Apparel, follows their classic closer-fitting style. If you prefer a baggier look, order a larger size. If there is not a larger size, consider starting a belly-hanging-out trend.