What will it turn into next?!?!?!?
When I purchased this shirt, it was with the understanding that it would, over the course of a week, evolve into a long sleeve tee, then a sweatshirt, then a sweater, then a cardigan sweater, then a convertible, then a princess.
It has not. No matter how much I water it and give it praise.
I have taken this as clear and inarguable proof that evolution is, in fact, a lie. I will write up these findings and print them in the big science journal. After that, all the scientists will see it and everyone will stop studying it, and move onto doing better things: like building robots with laser-shooting hands.
I couldn't have discovered this without you, Shirt.Woot. Science will never be able to thank you enough.
A totally real and reputable scientist