Make it Sew

by wootbot

The Next Stitcheration

2nd Place in Derby #367: Needlework, with 215 votes!

RIKUR: So anyway, I'm doing a half cross stitch and Worf is across the table trying to tell me that the continental stitch is a superior tent stitch, and I'm like "Klingon, please. There's no 'superior' tent stitch, it depends on the design."

WEZLEY: Wait, you said that to his face?

RIKUR: Damn right I did. 

WEZLEY: And he didn't bring up the whole slip-pass-stitch thing from Tagus III?

RIKUR: Of course he did, but he and I both know that I was right and the Taguans still cherish the Sunset Over Tagus needlepoint I did.

PICKARD enters

PICKARD: No. 1, Mr. Crusher.

RIKUR: Care to get in on this, Captain? We're making a pouch for Geordi's visor.

PICKARD: I'd love to, but I don't want to school both of you into French knots.

WEZLEY: Oh damn.

RIKUR: Don't make me drizzle stitch you into a Ferengi tapestry.

Red alert sounds, they all head to the bridge

DATTA: Captain, sensors are picking up a rift in the space-time continuum.

PICKARD: Our sensors can pick that up?

RIKUR: What is that?

Viewer shows a wormhole in a knot

DATTA: It appears to be a herringbone stitch.

PICKARD: Shields up, set phasers on Kensington outline.