Ninja By Night

by wootbot

Vegeterrible

2nd Place in Derby #366: 10K Round IV: Speciality Ink, with 360 votes!

"Gary, where’s the Flaunting Carrot?"

"You mean the large carrot that you routinely display as a symbol of disdain for rabbits, Harold? That Flaunting Carrot?"

"That’s correct, Gary. You know my hatred for rabbits runs deep."

"I do, indeed, Harold. Why, I remember only earlier today when you spoke at length about your contempt for bunnies."

"I did, Gary. Thank you for remembering."

"You said, 'I hate their little tails and their arrogance'."

"Again, Gary, your memory is impeccable. Yes, I realize that my status as a highly-evolved human means nitpicking about the habits of rabbits seems peculiar, but it’s simply something I cannot stand."

"Well, Harold, we all have our peeves. Anyway, I’m afraid I don’t know what happened to your Flaunting Carrot this evening."

"Very mysterious, Gary. Ah, well. It was, in actuality, only a large carrot that I had appropriated for use as a symbolic Flaunting Carrot. I’ll simply replace it with another large carrot for flaunting."

"Excellent idea, Harold."

"Thank you, Gary. Gosh, I know I speak of the topic frequently, but I’d just like to reiterate how much I dislike rabbits. I abhor their fuzzy ears and I hold their political views in great disregard."

"Fair enough, Harold."

Thump. Thump. Thwoop. Gag.

"Harold…?"