Sleep Patterns

by wootbot

The Birds

2nd place in Derby #333: Personality Types with 187 votes!

Birds are all around us! They are everywhere! They are in the sky and on the ground! Take a wooden table and cut it in half and what do you find? Many, many tiny microscopic birds! Birds that look like wood dust! 

There are birds under the couch, birds in the medicine cabinet, birds under our clothes! Ice is just frozen water, which is itself a compound made up of three elemental birds!

The words we say to each other, birds! The tears we cry, birds! The farts we fart, birds!

Many scientists believe our whole planet is one giant bird flying through the solar system! Others believe that it is millions of normal sized birds flocking together! Others still believe that the whole universe is actually inside a colossal bird, a theory that many dispute on the basis of smell, because if we were really inside a bird, wouldn't it smell kinda gross?

At any rate, one thing is clear: there are birds!