Toil and Trouble

by wootbot

Some Fear Shakespeare

1st Place in Derby #321: Text as Art, with 268 votes!

LADY MACBETH 
Art thou afeard
To be the same in thine own act and valour,
As thou art in desire? Wouldst thou have that
Which thou esteem'st the ornament of life,
And live a coward in thy own esteem;
Letting "I dare not" wait upon "I would,"
Like the poor cat i' the adage.

MACBETH
Prithee, peace:
Wait, what cat are you talking about?

LADY MACBETH
Y'know ... the old cat adage. 

MACBETH
There's more than one way to skin a cat? 

LADY MACBETH
No, no -- the other one
The one about ... you know .. "I dare not." 

MACBETH
I don't think this is an actual saying. Maybe
Something you just heard sometime? 

LADY MACBETH
I swear it's a saying! My mom used t'say 
It all the time!

MACBETH
Well, people do like cats, so let's leave it 
In the play. 

LADY MACBETH 
What play? 

MACBETH
The play we're in right now. 

LADY MACBETH
Ohhhh we're in a play. That explains why
I'm wearing this absurd dress. What's it called? 

MACBETH
I can't say. 

LADY MACBETH
Why not? 

MACBETH
It's bad luck, apparently. 

LADY MACBETH
Why? 

MACBETH
I'm not sure, but I think because
You and I both die in it. 

LADY MACBETH
Gerp.