Two Queens

by Wootbot

With apologies to that tantric doofus

2nd place in Derby #197: Royalty, with 888 votes!

We’re through the looking glass here, people.

There’s another t-shirt on our site today
That’s the same thing that happens here every day
There’s the Queen of Hearts with her image mirrored
But there’s something about it which is downright weird

Her reflection’s appearance should be just like hers
Well, except in the mirror everything’s reversed
But the image she sees there in the glass displayed
Belongs, for some reason, to the Queen of Spades

There is something about this that is not quite right
(That’s just physics, dude)
It just isn’t consistent with reflected light
(It’s just physics, dude)
What we’re looking at here defies common sense
(It’s just physics, dude)
Is it something with the angle of incidence?
(It’s just physics, dude)

She is standing before a full-length looking glass
She don’t cast the reflection that you’d think she’d cast
I just don’t understand why she’s not more dismayed
To appear in the mirror as the Queen of Spades

There’s a way we expect a mirror to behave
(That’s just physics, dude)
There’s a model of light, a dual particle-wave
(It’s just physics, dude)
I may not understand what all those theories are
(I flunked physics, dude)
But I’ve seen mirrors before, this one’s all FUBAR
(Simple physics, dude)

She is standing before a full-length looking glass
She don’t cast the reflection that you’d think she’d cast
I just don’t understand why she’s not more dismayed
To appear in the mirror as the Queen of Spades

There’s a chick in the mirror in a whole other dress
There’s a possibility it’s magic, I guess
There’s no way—you could try, but I’m thinking that no
There’s no way to explain this weird scenario

Queen of Spades

There’s a redhead whose hair somehow reflects as black
There’s a heart that’s embroidered across her back
There’s another new shirt on the site today
Like a different new shirt was here yesterday

She is standing before a full-length looking glass
She don’t cast the reflection that you’d think she’d cast
I just don’t understand why she’s not more dismayed
To appear in the mirror as the Queen of Spades

Queen of Spades
Queen of Spades
Queen of Spades
What—how is she—Queen of Spades
This doesn’t—what? Queen of Spades
I don’t see how—Queen of Spades

Wear this shirt: to distract attention from your own total lack of reflection in mirrors.

Don’t wear this shirt: in the company of the Queen of Diamonds. If she gets the chance, she’ll beat you.

This shirt tells the world: “I’m asking her to make a change.”

We call this color: Card Suits Are Red And Black, Interview Suits Are Brown

 

Design Placement: Centered

Design Size:
3X – S: 12.00” x 13.76”
WXL - K4: 9.00” x 10.32”

Pantone Color(s): 7506C - 7530C - 486C - 167C - 485C - Black

Please check our sizing chart before you order. The Woot Tee follows a classic closer-fitting style. If you prefer a baggier look, order a larger size. If there is not a larger size, consider starting a belly-hanging-out trend.