Derby #193: Catchy Slogans for Everyday Products
It's weird to think that in today's world, just existing subjects you to a ceaseless bombardment of advertising, marketing gimmicks, and various ham-fisted attempts to convince you to buy junk. People will buy a t-shirt with a logo on it, essentially paying for the right to be walking billboards. So why not spread the capitalist spirit? This week give us your best takes on updated, "hip," and new slogans for common, every day products. Let us be perfectly clear: you're not coming up with slogans for trademarked brands, so no "Mountain Dew: For When You Need to Drink Vegetable Oil!" shirts. You would have to do something like "Green Viscous Soda!" Other generic products to give you a better idea include bread, toothpaste, toilet paper, Cola, and yard sticks. Now for the rules:
- No copyrighted or trademarked product names. Seriously. Keep it generic.
- Your design must have a graphic element. No "text only" designs.
- No using any existing slogan or part of an existing slogan for a different product. So your "Bananas: Just Do It" design will have to wait.
- Your product must be real. We'll do a "slogans for made up products" derby the next time we want to go text heavy.
- We mean tangible things instead of concepts. Not "sleeping" or "exercise" or "advice".
- We're not looking for you to create a brand. Your shirt should promote the objects themselves.