Birds get to fly. Fish get to swim.
I get these stupid legs.
I’m tellin’ you, Gary, we have lost the genetic lottery. No fangs, no heat-sensing pits, no sonar. Even our method of locomotion is boring! I want a means of conveyance that involves gliding or riding along currents that propel me. I want to wheel around in the sky. I want to explode from the inky depths into the blinding light before crashing back into the sea!
But no. I have these two stupid legs and I walk around everywhere like a jerk. I’ll never soar above the cliffs. I’ll never glide silently through the black-as-midnight deep. I’ll just sit on the couch and eat Funyuns. Sometimes I feel like the world is out to get me, Gary.
Oh, right, like I’m gonna swim with these stupid arms!
Wear this shirt: To the beach. Maybe the sea creatures will take a choreographic hint.
Don’t wear this shirt: In the desert.
This shirt tells the world: “Who says nature has to be cruel?”
We call this color: Heather Gray Whale
Design Placement: Centered
Design Size:
3X – S: 13.51” x 19”
WXL - WS: 10.13“ x 14.25”
K12 - K4: 8.88” x 12.5”
Pantone Colors: 7499C – 7408C – Cool Gray 7C – 5285C – 5265C
Please check our before you order. The Woot Tee follows a classic closer-fitting style. If you prefer a baggier look, order a larger size. If there is not a larger size, consider starting a belly-hanging-out trend.
