2nd place in Derby #129: Ancient Egypt, with 731 votes!

CAIRO, Egypt – An illustrated tapestry recently unearthed here seems to suggest that plumbing, long believed to be a primarily Roman invention, may in fact have originated in ancient Egypt.

Depicting a leaping figure wearing boots, a cap, and a form of ancient Egyptian overalls, the illustration indicates that Egypt can claim credit for the now-iconic plumber archetype.

“It’s remarkable how contemporary the plumber figure looks,” says Prof. Martin Etcharles of the University of Shigeru. “It looks like something that could have been drawn in the early 1980s in Japan.”

The tapestry is believed to date from the reign of Pharaoh Bowserkhamun III, during the so-called Mushroom Dynasty. Etcharles says that the whole field of plumbing archaeology has been electrified by the discovery.

“Of course, there’s always the possibility we’re getting too fixated on this plumber character,” he says. “But we wouldn’t be the first to do that.”

Wear this shirt: when you go down that pipe into the mummy’s tomb.

Don’t wear this shirt: around your jealous brother. You know, the one who grew a mustache just like yours and wears outfits like yours, only in a different color.

This shirt tells the world: “For me ‘ancient history’ means 1987.”

We call this color: Cream of Mushroom.

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