Deforestation

by skirochester

$15.00
$18.00 17% off List Price

Printed to order.

Ships in 3-5 business days

Cream
New
Limit 15 per customer
add to cart

TIMMMMMBEEE-

1st place in Derby #90: Almost, with 967 votes!

Picture it: you’ve got a cush job at one of America’s fastest-growing retailers. All you have to do every day is write a few product descriptions and blog posts and stuff like that, and your innate wit and verbal acuity make it easy. You float into work each morning supremely confident that whatever assignment they throw at you, whatever product you have to wax funny about, you’ll be able to fling a few pithy quips at it and call it a day.

Then this shirt wins the Derby. And you realize that all your little jokes are trivial in the face of ecological catastrophe. But you’ve still got to earn your paycheck, so after much agonizing and many false starts, you write these:

Wear this shirt: when you’re eating fast-food burgers and drinking from a styrofoam cup while you drive your SUV to your job clubbing baby seals.

Don’t wear this shirt: while you’re chained to a tree to try to save old-growth forest. This color really soaks up blood.

This shirt tells the world: “Everyone makes mistakes. That’s why pencils have erasers. And bulldozers are kind of like God’s erasers. He must’ve made those forests on accident.”

We call this color: Cream Dioxide.

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Features

Pantone Colors:
189C - 190C - 184C 198C - 7540C

Features:
• Fiber Content: 4.5 oz 100% Combed Ringspun Cotton
• Manufactured In: Honduras/Nicaragua
• Printed In Carrollton, Texas, USA
• These shirts are printed to order. That means most of the time, we'll be printing using DTG technology

Sizing Chart:
Please check our sizing chart before you order.

Sales Stats

Speed to First Woot:
0m 4.000s
First Sucker:
yankeebird
Last Wooter to Woot:
Malshrashra

Purchaser Experience

  • 0% first woot
  • 94% second woot
  • 6% < 10 woots
  • 0% < 25 woots
  • 0% ≥ 25 woots

Purchaser Seniority

  • 11% joined today
  • 2% one week old
  • 7% one month old
  • 42% one year old
  • 38% > one year old

Quantity Breakdown

  • 94% bought 1
  • 5% bought 2
  • 1% bought 3 or more

Percentage of Sales Per Hour

19%
6%
4%
2%
1%
3%
5%
6%
8%
8%
5%
6%
3%
2%
3%
3%
3%
3%
2%
2%
3%
2%
2%
3%
12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

Percentage of Sales Per Day

1%
1%
1%
0%
96%
1%
1%
Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat Sun

Woots by State

zero wooters wootinglots of wooters wooting

Top Comments

What are Top Comments?

Top Comments are discussion forum posts we have deemed worthy of your time. Listen, we get a lot of comments, and most of the time, it's pretty forgettable stuff; but sometimes you rise to the top like butterfat in milk. We don't recommend you base your self-worth on how often we feature your comments, but we don't expressly forbid it either.

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Deforestation by skirochester
$15.00 In Stock Apparel & Accessories
$15.00 USD false 1 Retail EA
1 15
Woot! Shirt.Woot
4121 International Pkwy Carollton TX 75007 U.S.A.