Delusions of Grandeur

by cmdixon2

$15.00
$18.00 17% off List Price

Printed to order.

Ships in 3-5 business days

Asphalt
New
Limit 15 per customer
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I’m Starting With The Kitty In The Mirror

2nd place in Derby #196: Amusement Parks, with 841 votes!

Peggy? Peggy, it’s Florence. Look, I hate to bother you on your vacation, but it’s about Jasper. He’s… Well, I think there might be something wrong with him.

He’s just so lethargic! He seems so aloof, too, and really full of himself. He just lays wherever he wants, you know? In the doorway, right behind me when I’m cooking, on my laptop keyboard while I’m trying to work… And don’t get me started on how many times I’ve had to scold him for getting on the table on the kitchen counter. I swear, sometimes I think he does it just to provoke me! Ugh, and he’s started this thing where he knocks things off my dresser in the middle of the night. And do you know what he does when I get up to swat him off? He jumps down and immediately lays in the warm place I’ve made in the bed!

Peggy, I hate to worry you, and I know I should have told you I’ve never actually owned a cat before when I agreed to cat-sit, but I’m not sure what to do! Should I call your vet? Would feeding him a new cat food help? Maybe some catnip might calm him down.

What? Oh. This is all normal? Really? Like, normal for Jasper or for cats in general? REALLY. Huh.

No, no, I’m just glad there’s nothing wrong with him. And I’ll be really glad when you get home.

Wear this shirt: when you need a boost of confidence.

Don’t wear this shirt: if you’re under the size limit.

This shirt tells the world: “Tiger blood isn’t exclusive to wife-beating lunatic celebrities.”

We call this color: Asphalt On The Ego

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Features

Pantone Colors:
600C - 431C - 142C - 131C - 3282C - Black

Features:
• Fiber Content: 4.5 oz 100% Combed Ringspun Cotton
• Manufactured In: Honduras/Nicaragua
• Printed In Carrollton, Texas, USA
• These shirts are printed to order. That means most of the time, we'll be printing using DTG technology

Sizing Chart:
Please check our sizing chart before you order.

Sales Stats

Speed to First Woot:
1m 10.000s
First Sucker:
ebullient
Last Wooter to Woot:
zeft

Purchaser Experience

  • 0% first woot
  • 91% second woot
  • 9% < 10 woots
  • 0% < 25 woots
  • 0% ≥ 25 woots

Purchaser Seniority

  • 6% joined today
  • 1% one week old
  • 5% one month old
  • 25% one year old
  • 62% > one year old

Quantity Breakdown

  • 91% bought 1
  • 7% bought 2
  • 1% bought 3 or more

Percentage of Sales Per Hour

11%
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7%
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12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

Percentage of Sales Per Day

5%
2%
1%
2%
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85%
3%
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Woots by State

zero wooters wootinglots of wooters wooting

Top Comments

What are Top Comments?

Top Comments are discussion forum posts we have deemed worthy of your time. Listen, we get a lot of comments, and most of the time, it's pretty forgettable stuff; but sometimes you rise to the top like butterfat in milk. We don't recommend you base your self-worth on how often we feature your comments, but we don't expressly forbid it either.

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Delusions of Grandeur by cmdixon2
$15.00 In Stock Apparel & Accessories
$15.00 USD false 1 Retail EA
1 15
Woot! Shirt.Woot
4121 International Pkwy Carollton TX 75007 U.S.A.