Masque of the Red Death

by zenne

$15.00
$18.00 17% off List Price

Printed to order.

Ships in 3-5 business days

Navy
New
Limit 15 per customer
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Coffee, Tea, or “Profuse Bleeding At The Pores”?

I never listened to most of my Mama’s advice. Like, what do I care if the people at the morgue see that I’m wearing dirty underwear?

But there’s one rule she laid down that I’ll never break: don’t party with girls wearing creepy masks. Doesn’t matter how fine the freak is. It doesn’t matter if she’s hot enough to set skeletons on fire. Stay the hell away – or you’ll be lucky if all you get is a burning sensation down below.

Oh, one more thing Mama said: don’t ever let yourself be a character in a Poe story. That’s no kinda way to live.

Wear this shirt: to those illicit masquerades at the big estate just outside town, where notable local libertines cavort in shadowed rooms, indulging in unspeakable delights of the flesh. Or to your scrapbooking group.

Don’t wear this shirt: if you pronounce the word “masque” like “mask-wuh” or “mass-cue”. Caveat: you may still wear it if you’re mispronouncing intentionally for humorous effect.

This shirt tells the world: “Am I a metaphor for syphilis, or am I just glad to see you?”

We call this color: In The Navy, Yes, You Can Catch Some Strange Disease.

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Features

Pantone Colors:
453C - 5493C - 5473C- 485C - 484C - 208C

Features:
• Fiber Content: 4.5 oz 100% Combed Ringspun Cotton
• Manufactured In: Honduras/Nicaragua
• Printed In Carrollton, Texas, USA
• These shirts are printed to order. That means most of the time, we'll be printing using DTG technology

Sizing Chart:
Please check our sizing chart before you order.

Sales Stats

Speed to First Woot:
0m 26.000s
First Sucker:
denstark
Last Wooter to Woot:
Nikosaurus

Purchaser Experience

  • 0% first woot
  • 95% second woot
  • 5% < 10 woots
  • 0% < 25 woots
  • 0% ≥ 25 woots

Purchaser Seniority

  • 7% joined today
  • 1% one week old
  • 5% one month old
  • 40% one year old
  • 48% > one year old

Quantity Breakdown

  • 95% bought 1
  • 5% bought 2
  • 0% bought 3 or more

Percentage of Sales Per Hour

16%
6%
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5%
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3%
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12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

Percentage of Sales Per Day

92%
1%
1%
1%
2%
1%
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Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat Sun

Woots by State

zero wooters wootinglots of wooters wooting

Top Comments

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Masque of the Red Death by zenne
$15.00 In Stock Apparel & Accessories
$15.00 USD false 1 Retail EA
1 15
Woot! Shirt.Woot
4121 International Pkwy Carollton TX 75007 U.S.A.