Monkey Vs. Narwhal

by Greg Abbott

$15.00
$18.00 17% off List Price

Printed to order.

Ships in 3-5 business days

Baby Blue
New
Limit 15 per customer
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Photo-Reference

What do you mean I can’t get the monkey here until 4 o’clock? I’m losing my light here!

You clearly don’t understand what’s at stake here. Do the words “Shirt.Woot” mean anything to you? SHIRT DOT WOOT. What are you, some sort of savage or something? This is great. This is just fan-stupid-tastic. I am TRYING to create art here and you are impeding my vision with ignorance and incompetence.

Look, so you have any idea what I’ve been through to make this commission work? I’ve spent days of brain power and planning coming up with this concept, sir. WEEKS, EVEN. I have spared absolutely no expense hiring photographers, renting a beach, and getting a narwhal from the local aquarium for this photo shoot so that I have the perfect photograph with which to create A MASTERPIECE IN SHIRT DESIGN. Do you know how hard it is to get a narwhal this time of year? Well, apparently, it’s only slightly harder than getting the monkey you paid for weeks ago TO SHOW UP WHEN HE’S SUPPOSED TO.

Fine. FINE. You know what? Keep your stupid monkey. I guess I’ll just have to find a small child to battle the narwhal and work with that instead. But I’m telling you, if I don’t receive my deposit back PRONTO, you’ll be hearing from my attorney.

Wear this shirt: with pants. Or shorts. Maybe even a fetching skirt.

Don’t wear this shirt: in front of Simian-Man, who took up a mission of vengeance when a narwhal killed his parents as they were leaving a movie theatre.

This shirt tells the world: “No animals were harmed in the making of this shirt.”

We call this color: Baby Blue Battle To The Death

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Features

Pantone Colors:
White - 1895C - 190C - 1915C - 5415C - 5405C - 535C - Black

Features:
• Fiber Content: 4.5 oz 100% Combed Ringspun Cotton
• Manufactured In: Honduras/Nicaragua
• Printed In Carrollton, Texas, USA
• These shirts are printed to order. That means most of the time, we'll be printing using DTG technology

Sizing Chart:
Please check our sizing chart before you order.

Sales Stats

Speed to First Woot:
1m 8.000s
First Sucker:
JeffCannity
Last Wooter to Woot:
ANBUMAK

Purchaser Experience

  • 0% first woot
  • 96% second woot
  • 4% < 10 woots
  • 0% < 25 woots
  • 0% ≥ 25 woots

Purchaser Seniority

  • 15% joined today
  • 2% one week old
  • 5% one month old
  • 26% one year old
  • 52% > one year old

Quantity Breakdown

  • 96% bought 1
  • 3% bought 2
  • 1% bought 3 or more

Percentage of Sales Per Hour

11%
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6%
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Percentage of Sales Per Day

1%
86%
4%
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Woots by State

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Monkey Vs. Narwhal by Greg Abbott
$15.00 In Stock Apparel & Accessories
$15.00 USD false 1 Retail EA
1 15
Woot! Shirt.Woot
4121 International Pkwy Carollton TX 75007 U.S.A.