Portrait of the Walrus as a Young Man

by theinfinityloop

$15.00
$18.00 17% off List Price

Printed to order.

Ships in 3-5 business days

Brown
New
Limit 15 per customer
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Oh, Do Benny Day

2nd place in Derby #174 Crosshatch , with 657 votes!

Once upon a time and a very good time it was there was a baby seacow coming up onto the ice and this seacow that was coming up onto the ice met a baby gentoo

His father told him that story; his father had vibrissae.

He ate baby gentoo. The seacow came up onto the ice where that penguin lived; he squashed him flat.

O, Rose, marry us
On that poor penguin’s face

He sang that song. That was his song.

When your belly touches ice first it is warm and then it is cold. His mothers were Polly, Ester. His blubber felt like gel.

His father had tusks and howled. He taught the song that brought Mother to the water. He sang too:

Baculala lala
Baculala ladum
Baculala lala
Baculala lala

Uncle Charles and Dante clapped, but father chased them away because he was a bull walrus. No man could come too close to Mother.

-What is your name?

Stephen had answered: Stephen Dedwalrus.

Wear this shirt: Bloomsday. You’ll have to explain it but when did that stop a real Joycean?

Don’t wear this shirt: while swimming near orcas. It’s one of the few walrus predators and since they also eat people, you’ve be like one of those soft-wrap tacos in this shirt.

This shirt tells the world: “Husstenhasstencaffincoffintussemt
ossemdamandamnacosaghcusaghhobixhatouxpeswchbechoscashlcarcarcar
ac is actually a pretty good walrus noise, when you get right down to it.”

We call this color: Brown is this color’s name/Woot is its location/Texas its current dwellingplace/Your house its expectation.

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Features

Pantone Colors:
141C

Features:
• Fiber Content: 4.5 oz 100% Combed Ringspun Cotton
• Manufactured In: Honduras/Nicaragua
• Printed In Carrollton, Texas, USA
• These shirts are printed to order. That means most of the time, we'll be printing using DTG technology

Sizing Chart:
Please check our sizing chart before you order.

Sales Stats

Speed to First Woot:
1m 9.000s
First Sucker:
towerspace
Last Wooter to Woot:
JDwyerM

Purchaser Experience

  • 0% first woot
  • 96% second woot
  • 4% < 10 woots
  • 0% < 25 woots
  • 0% ≥ 25 woots

Purchaser Seniority

  • 10% joined today
  • 1% one week old
  • 2% one month old
  • 22% one year old
  • 64% > one year old

Quantity Breakdown

  • 96% bought 1
  • 3% bought 2
  • 1% bought 3 or more

Percentage of Sales Per Hour

10%
5%
2%
2%
1%
1%
2%
3%
6%
4%
5%
5%
5%
5%
9%
5%
4%
4%
4%
3%
3%
4%
4%
4%
12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

Percentage of Sales Per Day

4%
8%
4%
2%
3%
76%
4%
Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat Sun

Woots by State

zero wooters wootinglots of wooters wooting

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Portrait of the Walrus as a Young Man by theinfinityloop
$15.00 In Stock Apparel & Accessories
$15.00 USD false 1 Retail EA
1 15
Woot! Shirt.Woot
4121 International Pkwy Carollton TX 75007 U.S.A.