Raisins Ruin Everything

by bootsboots

$15.00
$18.00 17% off List Price

Printed to order.

Ships in 3-5 business days

Royal Blue
New
Limit 15 per customer
add to cart

Nice try, Sun-Maid. I ain’t buyin’.

3rd place in Derby #201: Double-Take Derby 13, with 621 votes!

Don’t buy the hype, America! Big Grape would have you believe that raisins are healthy snack alternatives with fiber and nutrients. They want you to think they’re better than candy bars or chocolate. No way! I’ll never eat one, and I won’t let anyone I care about eat one, either.

Do you know where raisins come from? There’s no such thing as a raisin tree. They don’t grow on vines. They’re GRAPES. They’re old, dried out grapes. These monsters put grapes out in the sun and wait for them to dry out and shrivel up and wither. They think that makes them BETTER. You know what we call that where I come from? They call that ROTTING.

Seriously. Try selling people some chicken that you just let sit out in the sun for a couple days. See who gets excited about that. WAKE UP SHEEPLE, THEY’RE FEEDING YOU ROTTEN FRUIT!

Wear this shirt: In a size too small as you cram another fistful of Oreos down your gullet.

Don’t wear this shirt: While eating a Chunky.

This shirt tells the world: It’s pretty clear, right? I mean, we don’t really have to make anything up here. Raisins suck.

We call this color: Raisiny Royal Blue

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Features

Pantone Colors:
White - 7509C - 7510C - 1545C - 655C

Features:
• Fiber Content: 4.5 oz 100% Combed Ringspun Cotton
• Manufactured In: Honduras/Nicaragua
• Printed In Carrollton, Texas, USA
• These shirts are printed to order. That means most of the time, we'll be printing using DTG technology

Sizing Chart:
Please check our sizing chart before you order.

Sales Stats

Speed to First Woot:
1m 9.000s
First Sucker:
trevorstearns
Last Wooter to Woot:
abkess

Purchaser Experience

  • 0% first woot
  • 95% second woot
  • 5% < 10 woots
  • 0% < 25 woots
  • 0% ≥ 25 woots

Purchaser Seniority

  • 8% joined today
  • 1% one week old
  • 2% one month old
  • 19% one year old
  • 70% > one year old

Quantity Breakdown

  • 95% bought 1
  • 4% bought 2
  • 1% bought 3 or more

Percentage of Sales Per Hour

10%
4%
2%
2%
1%
1%
2%
4%
5%
5%
6%
5%
5%
10%
5%
4%
3%
3%
3%
4%
4%
5%
4%
4%
12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

Percentage of Sales Per Day

6%
11%
4%
3%
3%
2%
72%
Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat Sun

Woots by State

zero wooters wootinglots of wooters wooting

Top Comments

What are Top Comments?

Top Comments are discussion forum posts we have deemed worthy of your time. Listen, we get a lot of comments, and most of the time, it's pretty forgettable stuff; but sometimes you rise to the top like butterfat in milk. We don't recommend you base your self-worth on how often we feature your comments, but we don't expressly forbid it either.

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Raisins Ruin Everything by bootsboots
$15.00 In Stock Apparel & Accessories
$15.00 USD false 1 Retail EA
1 15
Woot! Shirt.Woot
4121 International Pkwy Carollton TX 75007 U.S.A.