Rebel Attack

by Wirdou

$15.00
$18.00 17% off List Price

Printed to order.

Ships in 3-5 business days

Silver
New
Limit 15 per customer
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Oedipus Probably Had A Self Complex

1st place in Derby #257: On The Beach, with 674 votes!   

OEDIPUS:
Aaaiiii, aaaiii . . . Alas! Alas!
How miserable I am . . . such wretchedness . . .
Where do I go? How can the wings of air                                      
sweep up my voice? Oh my destiny,
how far you have sprung now!

CHORUS LEADER
To Dagobah, to that fateful place where men will look away
To hide from what horrors you have wreaked. 

OEDIPUS
His sand castle, I knew it not.
That dire prophesy seen out
The agony of my father's face
Pierces me! The memory of aching shame.

[OEDIPUS BLINDS HIMSELF]

CHORUS LEADER
That is a bit dramatic. After all
We know that you can see with
A blast shield on. So boo-hoo.

OEDIPUS
If I could see, I don't know how my eyes
Could look at my own father when I come
To Hades. Though will I still be blind
When I become one of those ghost Jedi guys?
Ah me! What tortures await me there.
The only thing that could be worse than this
Would be if somebody told me I had been
Sexually aroused by my sister.

[CHORUS WRINGS HANDS NERVOUSLY, LOOKING AT EACH OTHER AND MUMBLING "SHOULD YOU TELL HIM OR SHOULD I?"]

Wear this shirt: to the beach to protect against both suns' UV rays.

Don't wear this shirt: on Arrakis.

This shirt tells the world: "I have complicated feelings about my father, unlike everybody else."

We call this color: There aren't many Star Wars puns related to silver.

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Features

Pantone Colors:
Pantone Colors - Black - 445C - 7541C - 430C - 428C

Features:
• Fiber Content: 4.5 oz 100% Combed Ringspun Cotton
• Manufactured In: Honduras/Nicaragua
• Printed In Carrollton, Texas, USA
• These shirts are printed to order. That means most of the time, we'll be printing using DTG technology

Sizing Chart:
Please check our sizing chart before you order.

Sales Stats

Speed to First Woot:
1m 11.223s
First Sucker:
DannySaiz
Last Wooter to Woot:
azulean

Purchaser Experience

  • 0% first woot
  • 94% second woot
  • 6% < 10 woots
  • 0% < 25 woots
  • 0% ≥ 25 woots

Purchaser Seniority

  • 11% joined today
  • 1% one week old
  • 2% one month old
  • 22% one year old
  • 63% > one year old

Quantity Breakdown

  • 94% bought 1
  • 5% bought 2
  • 1% bought 3 or more

Percentage of Sales Per Hour

6%
4%
2%
1%
1%
3%
3%
7%
8%
5%
4%
9%
6%
6%
5%
4%
4%
3%
4%
4%
4%
3%
1%
1%
12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

Percentage of Sales Per Day

5%
5%
4%
4%
74%
4%
4%
Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat Sun

Woots by State

zero wooters wootinglots of wooters wooting

Top Comments

What are Top Comments?

Top Comments are discussion forum posts we have deemed worthy of your time. Listen, we get a lot of comments, and most of the time, it's pretty forgettable stuff; but sometimes you rise to the top like butterfat in milk. We don't recommend you base your self-worth on how often we feature your comments, but we don't expressly forbid it either.

join the discussion (78 comments)
join the discussion (78 comments)
Rebel Attack by Wirdou
$15.00 In Stock Apparel & Accessories
$15.00 USD false 1 Retail EA
1 15
Woot! Shirt.Woot
4121 International Pkwy Carollton TX 75007 U.S.A.