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Grim Optimism

by ramyb

$19.00 + free shipping
Limit 15 per customer
  • Standard - Estimated delivery Dec 16 - Dec 17
  • Express - Estimated delivery Dec 13
  • Free Express shipping for Prime members

It’s Death’s World; You’re Just a Squirrel

1st place in Derby #73: Optimism, with 1800 votes!

Hewwo widdle fuzzy fwiend! Aren’t you the sweetest widdle chubby widdle fuzzy-wuzzy-cutie-patootie! Look at that chubby-wubby belly! I just want to eat you up, you’re such a sweetie-petey! Yes you are! Oh, yes you are! Look at yoouuu!

Aww, is that for me? Did widdle fuzzy-wuzzy sweetie-pie bwing me a widdle nut? Did you bwing me a widdle acorn? Did you? Well, thank you vewwy much! Yes, thank you widdle fuzzy bubbeleh! Aren’t you the sweetest widdle fuzzy! Yes you are! Such a widdle sweetie! I wuv you, wittle fuzzy-poo! Oh yes I do! Oh yes I do!

Sigh! That’s the cutest thing ever. I wish I had a camera. It’s moments like these that make the death biz worthwhile.

Now come, squirrel; your time is at an end.

This shirt was designed by: ramyb, that mysterious figure who rode out of the east to conquer two Derbies in a row. You know, you can still buy last week’s winner, Two Fish Who Are Red And Blue.

Wear this shirt: to your summer job at your dad’s extermination and animal control company.

Don’t wear this shirt: to funerals. Except maybe squirrel funerals, where no one really cares what you wear, since they’re more occupied with the question of why you’re holding a funeral for a consarned squirrel.

This shirt tells the world: “Nuts to you, Death!”

We call this color: Acorny Pun Involving The Word Asphalt

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Our graphic tees are made for all those days (see every day) that you need to get shirt done! Our professionally printed t-shirts are produced in-house to create an experience you will never forget.

Seriously, our t-shirts have been a graphic tee loving enthusiast's favorite since 2007. Our t-shirt designs are created by the best artists in the industry. We know that the combination of our t-shirts, exclusive design selection, world-class artists, and quality production, makes people smile.

Sizing Chart:

Please check our sizing chart before you order.

Classic T-Shirt Fit:

This shirt is made for those of you that like a looser fitting shirt (classic seemed appropriate)! This t-shirt is made from the finest ring spun cotton to make you look Woot-astic!

  • Standard fit (slightly boxy t-shirt, a little loose)
  • Fiber Content: 4.5 oz/yd 100% Combed ring spun cotton
  • Manufactured In: Honduras
  • Printed In: Carrollton, Texas, USA

Fitted T-Shirt Fit:

Our fitted t-shirts are made for those times when you want to feel slimmer — or when you want to go out on the town — or just because you like fitted shirts 'cause you're slim and stuff. This t-shirt is made from the finest ring spun cotton to make you look fit-astic (get it?)!

  • Fitted T-Shirt fit (narrower shoulder and body)
  • Fiber Content: 4.2 oz/yd 100% Combed ring spun cotton
  • Manufactured In: USA, Central America, Vietnam or Bangladesh
  • Printed In: Carrollton, Texas, USA


Sales Stats

Speed to First Woot:
0m 19.000s
First Sucker:
Last Wooter to Woot:

Purchaser Experience

  • 0% first woot
  • 95% second woot
  • 5% < 10 woots
  • 0% < 25 woots
  • 0% ≥ 25 woots

Purchaser Seniority

  • 15% joined today
  • 4% one week old
  • 7% one month old
  • 37% one year old
  • 37% > one year old

Quantity Breakdown

  • 95% bought 1
  • 4% bought 2
  • 1% bought 3 or more

Percentage of Sales Per Hour

12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

Percentage of Sales Per Day

Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat Sun

Woots by State

zero wooters wootinglots of wooters wooting

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Grim Optimism by ramyb
$19.00 In Stock Apparel & Accessories
$19.00 USD false 1 Retail EA
1 15
Woot! Shirt.Woot
4121 International Pkwy Carollton TX 75007 U.S.A.