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oh shiny

by chumpmagic

$19.00 + free shipping
Limit 15 per customer
  • Standard - Estimated delivery Dec 23 - Dec 25
  • Express - Estimated delivery Dec 20
  • Free Express shipping for Prime members

Probably Just A Gator With A Laser Pointer

2nd place in Derby #162: Cryptozoology Redux, with 827 votes!

You can talk about aliens and pixies all you like, but it ain’t ever gonna be real. All those crazy things you see? Them UFOs and ninety foot tall giants and cyclopses and wookalars and half man, half bat crusaders fighting for justice? Swamp gas. Yep, just a ball of sentient swamp gas, ready and willing to take over the world.

That’s why you’ve got to be careful in the swamp. You gotta have a flamethrower, of course, and not just because that’s cool. You gotta have a flamethrower because if that gas sneaks up on you, fire’s the only thing that’s gonna stop it. And even that ain’t gonna stop it for long. Because deep in the center of the Earth, there’s a giant bean burrito, just a’plottin’ how to bring about the downfall of man. And if we ain’t ever vigilant, that burrito’s gonna do it too. So remember! If you’re ever out alone, and you see a noise, you light up a match straight away! Maybe it’s just some nice familiar oxygen comin’ over to be friendly… or maybe… it ain’t.

Wear this shirt: fearlessly. Because he who wears this shirt and knows fear shall burn at the Man-Thing’s touch! See, ladies? This one time, 70’s sexism is a plus. And stop staring at our Man-Thing.

Don’t wear this shirt: and expect you’ll get Alan Moore to sign it. He’s probably moved on at this point.

This shirt tells the world: “I bet there’s a sweet X-Wing under here somewhere.”

We call this color: The Navy Would Be More Fun If They All Had Those Cool Boats With Giant Fans On The Back

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Our graphic tees are made for all those days (see every day) that you need to get shirt done! Our professionally printed t-shirts are produced in-house to create an experience you will never forget.

Seriously, our t-shirts have been a graphic tee loving enthusiast's favorite since 2007. Our t-shirt designs are created by the best artists in the industry. We know that the combination of our t-shirts, exclusive design selection, world-class artists, and quality production, makes people smile.

Sizing Chart:

Please check our sizing chart before you order.

Classic T-Shirt Fit:

This shirt is made for those of you that like a looser fitting shirt (classic seemed appropriate)! This t-shirt is made from the finest ring spun cotton to make you look Woot-astic!

  • Standard fit (slightly boxy t-shirt, a little loose)
  • Fiber Content: 4.5 oz/yd 100% Combed ring spun cotton
  • Manufactured In: Honduras
  • Printed In: Carrollton, Texas, USA

Fitted T-Shirt Fit:

Our fitted t-shirts are made for those times when you want to feel slimmer — or when you want to go out on the town — or just because you like fitted shirts 'cause you're slim and stuff. This t-shirt is made from the finest ring spun cotton to make you look fit-astic (get it?)!

  • Fitted T-Shirt fit (narrower shoulder and body)
  • Fiber Content: 4.2 oz/yd 100% Combed ring spun cotton
  • Manufactured In: USA, Central America, Vietnam or Bangladesh
  • Printed In: Carrollton, Texas, USA


Sales Stats

Speed to First Woot:
0m 36.000s
First Sucker:
Last Wooter to Woot:

Purchaser Experience

  • 0% first woot
  • 95% second woot
  • 5% < 10 woots
  • 0% < 25 woots
  • 0% ≥ 25 woots

Purchaser Seniority

  • 6% joined today
  • 1% one week old
  • 5% one month old
  • 28% one year old
  • 57% > one year old

Quantity Breakdown

  • 95% bought 1
  • 4% bought 2
  • 1% bought 3 or more

Percentage of Sales Per Hour

12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

Percentage of Sales Per Day

Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat Sun

Woots by State

zero wooters wootinglots of wooters wooting

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oh shiny by chumpmagic
$19.00 In Stock Apparel & Accessories
$19.00 USD false 1 Retail EA
1 15
Woot! Shirt.Woot
4121 International Pkwy Carollton TX 75007 U.S.A.