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Pie, Right?

by Brett Waldon AKA SeedUvPain

$19.00 + free shipping
Limit 15 per customer
  • Standard - Estimated delivery Dec 23 - Dec 25
  • Express - Estimated delivery Dec 20
  • Free Express shipping for Prime members

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The trick to being a successful server in this diner is being able to separate the good customers from the bad ones.

You’ll get the hang of it eventually, sugar. I’ve been here almost ten years and, I’m telling you, I’ve seen my fair share of freaks and jerks in this place.

For instance, take a look out at the counter. You see that guy out there? Yeah, him. The name on his debit card is Tyler, but he prefers you refer to him as “Cap’n Crumbbeard.” He sits right there every week in that same shirt and that silly eyepatch he wears under his glasses, always rambling on about some great battle against the “asphalt sea” he had to wage to get here and… Ah. Ah. ACHOO! Sniff. Sorry, sugar. I must be comin’ down with something.

Hey, Murray, you got the Chicken Fried Steak and mashed potatoes coming today, or what? Table fourteen is causin’ me all sorts of problems out here.

Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah. The thing about the good captain is that you’d think he’d be trouble, but he’s harmless. In fact, as long as you go along with his whatever-it-is-he’s-doing, he’s downright respectful. Yeah, he never complains, doesn’t give you a bunch of crap if he can see you’re busy, and – this is key – he tips extremely well. A lot of the crazy ones do. Something to keep in mind.

Guys like the one at table fourteen, the ones in the nice clothes and the nice haircuts and stuff, though? Nine times out of ten, those guys are real idiots, always “where’s my” this and “special order” that and always bustin’ your hump about something. And cheap, too. You’ll never get more than ten percent out of those creeps.

Is this mine, Murray? Thanks. Hey, hold on a sec, sugar, will ya? Houck. Houck. HOOOOOOOOOOOCK. There we go.

So yeah, the point is that just because some of the customers come off as a little odd doesn’t mean they’re jerks, you know? I’m sure you’ll figure it out. In fact, why don’t you see if Cap’n Crumbbeard would like another slice of baked “treasure?” I don’t want Mr. Table Fourteen’s “extra creamy” potatoes to get cold.

Wear this shirt: and prepare yourself for all the people who view it as an invitation to say “yar,” “argh,” and “booty” every time they see you wear it.

Don’t wear this shirt: if you fancy yourself more of a cake ninja.

This shirt tells the world: “Yer crust best be light and flaky, me hearties, or it’s Paula Deen’s Locker for the lot of ya.”

We call this color: Crumb-catcher Black

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Our graphic tees are made for all those days (see every day) that you need to get shirt done! Our professionally printed t-shirts are produced in-house to create an experience you will never forget.

Seriously, our t-shirts have been a graphic tee loving enthusiast's favorite since 2007. Our t-shirt designs are created by the best artists in the industry. We know that the combination of our t-shirts, exclusive design selection, world-class artists, and quality production, makes people smile.

Sizing Chart:

Please check our sizing chart before you order.

Classic T-Shirt Fit:

This shirt is made for those of you that like a looser fitting shirt (classic seemed appropriate)! This t-shirt is made from the finest ring spun cotton to make you look Woot-astic!

  • Standard fit (slightly boxy t-shirt, a little loose)
  • Fiber Content: 4.5 oz/yd 100% Combed ring spun cotton
  • Manufactured In: Honduras
  • Printed In: Carrollton, Texas, USA

Fitted T-Shirt Fit:

Our fitted t-shirts are made for those times when you want to feel slimmer — or when you want to go out on the town — or just because you like fitted shirts 'cause you're slim and stuff. This t-shirt is made from the finest ring spun cotton to make you look fit-astic (get it?)!

  • Fitted T-Shirt fit (narrower shoulder and body)
  • Fiber Content: 4.2 oz/yd 100% Combed ring spun cotton
  • Manufactured In: USA, Central America, Vietnam or Bangladesh
  • Printed In: Carrollton, Texas, USA


Sales Stats

Speed to First Woot:
1m 9.000s
First Sucker:
Last Wooter to Woot:

Purchaser Experience

  • 0% first woot
  • 88% second woot
  • 12% < 10 woots
  • 0% < 25 woots
  • 0% ≥ 25 woots

Purchaser Seniority

  • 9% joined today
  • 1% one week old
  • 3% one month old
  • 16% one year old
  • 71% > one year old

Quantity Breakdown

  • 88% bought 1
  • 9% bought 2
  • 2% bought 3 or more

Percentage of Sales Per Hour

12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

Percentage of Sales Per Day

Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat Sun

Woots by State

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Pie, Right? by Brett Waldon AKA SeedUvPain
$19.00 In Stock Apparel & Accessories
$19.00 USD false 1 Retail EA
1 15
Woot! Shirt.Woot
4121 International Pkwy Carollton TX 75007 U.S.A.