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Smarter Than The Average Bear

by Ian-S

$19.00 + free shipping
Limit 15 per customer
  • Standard - Estimated delivery Dec 15 - Dec 16
  • Express - Estimated delivery Dec 13
  • Free Express shipping for Prime members

Fuzzy Math

Not only smarter than the average bear, but also somewhat nicer than the mean bear.

Of all my college math instructors, Dr. Baer was the worst. A huge man, hirsute like a musk ox, he had an irritating habit of speaking in rhymes. Was it supposed to be cute? It didn’t help me make sense of the material. Above a certain level, mathematics gets hard enough to understand on its own. You really don’t need your professor taking the long way around an explanation for the sake of a rhyme.

He had no sense of personal boundaries, either. I remember the whole class watching in horror on two separate occasions as Dr. Baer helped himself to a sack lunch belonging to one of our classmates. He was, like, compulsive about it. There was nothing he craved more than other people’s take-along food. It was some kind of mad lust he had. It was extremely weird.

Worst of all, though, was when a student was called to the board to work out some problem in front of the class. The public blackboard solo is a high-pressure situation in any classroom. You’re filled with anxiety about making a mistake in front of your peers. Dr. Baer had a way of ratcheting up the nerves, though. Whenever some poor student would inevitably fumble a calculation, Dr. Baer would point it out by affecting this ludicrous Art Carney impression, and saying “hey there, boo-boo!”

Ugh, it was terrible, I’m telling you.

Wear this shirt: to your AP phys-a-nics class.

Don’t wear this shirt: to wilderness areas with names kind of like Yellowstone, but not quite Yellowstone. They are to the real thing as “cheez” is to cheese. Insist on authenticity!

This shirt tells the world: “I’m a whole different kind of ‘problem bear.’”

We call this color: Grrrass

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Our graphic tees are made for all those days (see every day) that you need to get shirt done! Our professionally printed t-shirts are produced in-house to create an experience you will never forget.

Seriously, our t-shirts have been a graphic tee loving enthusiast's favorite since 2007. Our t-shirt designs are created by the best artists in the industry. We know that the combination of our t-shirts, exclusive design selection, world-class artists, and quality production, makes people smile.

Sizing Chart:

Please check our sizing chart before you order.

Classic T-Shirt Fit:

This shirt is made for those of you that like a looser fitting shirt (classic seemed appropriate)! This t-shirt is made from the finest ring spun cotton to make you look Woot-astic!

  • Standard fit (slightly boxy t-shirt, a little loose)
  • Fiber Content: 4.5 oz/yd 100% Combed ring spun cotton
  • Manufactured In: Honduras
  • Printed In: Carrollton, Texas, USA

Fitted T-Shirt Fit:

Our fitted t-shirts are made for those times when you want to feel slimmer — or when you want to go out on the town — or just because you like fitted shirts 'cause you're slim and stuff. This t-shirt is made from the finest ring spun cotton to make you look fit-astic (get it?)!

  • Fitted T-Shirt fit (narrower shoulder and body)
  • Fiber Content: 4.2 oz/yd 100% Combed ring spun cotton
  • Manufactured In: USA, Central America, Vietnam or Bangladesh
  • Printed In: Carrollton, Texas, USA


Sales Stats

Speed to First Woot:
1m 21.000s
First Sucker:
Last Wooter to Woot:

Purchaser Experience

  • 0% first woot
  • 92% second woot
  • 8% < 10 woots
  • 0% < 25 woots
  • 0% ≥ 25 woots

Purchaser Seniority

  • 8% joined today
  • 1% one week old
  • 3% one month old
  • 23% one year old
  • 65% > one year old

Quantity Breakdown

  • 92% bought 1
  • 6% bought 2
  • 1% bought 3 or more

Percentage of Sales Per Hour

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Percentage of Sales Per Day

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Smarter Than The Average Bear by Ian-S
$19.00 In Stock Apparel & Accessories
$19.00 USD false 1 Retail EA
1 15
Woot! Shirt.Woot
4121 International Pkwy Carollton TX 75007 U.S.A.