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At Least It’s Not Knives

by Woot

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The Cruelest Month Begins Now

Maybe we’re not really selling a shirt today. Maybe it’s a big joke. And maybe we’re not going to pay our light bill, either.

The back is the most neglected of all areas. Unless you count the lungs. We actually tried to get a printer that would handle lung covers but it cost way too much and do you know what you have to pay for insurance for something like that? Good night Irene!

So the only option left to us was to start printing on the back. Keep in mind that from now on, every shirt will have an option to print on the back. It might mean more work for us, but really, you’re worth it, don’t you think?

Wear this shirt: your first day at a new school. With any luck, they’ll think you’ve already been hazed.

Don’t wear this shirt: if you’re friends with a sales representative for a major tape production company. You can’t expect him to endorse a message that might lead to a drop in his commission.

This shirt tells the world: “I’ve just been cyberbullied by the Amish.”

We call this color: Heather Graypril Fool’s! You’re not getting any of that “print on the back” stuff! It was all a big joke! Suckers! Now shut up and consume.

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Pantone Colors:
3935C - 353C - Pantone BlackC

Standard Brand:

  • Standard fit (slightly boxy, a little loose)
  • Fiber Content: 4.5 oz 100% Combed Ringspun Cotton
  • Manufactured In: Honduras/Nicaragua
  • Printed In: Carrollton, Texas, USA

American Apparel:

  • Slimmer fit (if you like a looser fit, order one size up from your usual size)
  • Fiber Content: 4.3 oz 100% Combed Ringspun Cotton
  • Manufactured In: USA
  • Printed In: Carrollton, Texas, USA

Sizing Chart:
Please check our sizing chart before you order.

Sales Stats

Speed to First Woot:
1m 4.000s
First Sucker:
Last Wooter to Woot:

Purchaser Experience

  • 0% first woot
  • 93% second woot
  • 7% < 10 woots
  • 0% < 25 woots
  • 0% ≥ 25 woots

Purchaser Seniority

  • 4% joined today
  • 2% one week old
  • 3% one month old
  • 36% one year old
  • 55% > one year old

Quantity Breakdown

  • 93% bought 1
  • 5% bought 2
  • 1% bought 3 or more

Percentage of Sales Per Hour

12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

Woots by State

zero wooters wootinglots of wooters wooting

Top Comments

What are Top Comments?

Top Comments are discussion forum posts we have deemed worthy of your time. Listen, we get a lot of comments, and most of the time, it's pretty forgettable stuff; but sometimes you rise to the top like butterfat in milk. We don't recommend you base your self-worth on how often we feature your comments, but we don't expressly forbid it either.

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At Least It’s Not Knives by Woot
$11.00 In Stock Apparel & Accessories
$11.00 $14.00 USD false 1 Retail EA
1 15
Woot! Shirt.Woot
4121 International Pkwy Carollton TX 75007 U.S.A.