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Death Cares About Life

by harantula

$15.00
$18.00 17% off List Price

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Asphalt
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Ashes To Ashes, Topsoil to Topsoil

1st Place in Derby #309: Balance, with 247 votes!

A lot of people ask me, "Why do you hate life so much?" But these people don't understand: I love life! If it weren't for life, I wouldn't have anything to reap with my scythe of eternal darkness. 

That's why I'm always encouraging others to pursue horticulture, animal husbandry, and parenthood. Because everything living must someday die, and that's where I come in! 

Awwww, look at that: a litter of fox kits. Isn't it a miracle that only one of them will survive to adulthood, and even that one will one day wither beneath the ravages of time?  

There are hidden bits of life that need extinguishing all over the place. You want a squirt of Purell? It will kill a hundred thousand microbes in a few seconds. Ahhhhhhhh. I love their little screams. 

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Features

Design Placement: Centered

Design Size:
3X - M, WXL - WL:  11.32” x 8.13”
S, WM - WS, K12 - K4:  9.00” x 6.46”

Pantone Color(s): Black - 5635C - 7485C - 418C - 367C - 318C

Features:

  • Fiber Content: 4.5 oz 100% Combed Ringspun Cotton
  • Manufactured In: Honduras/Nicaragua
  • Printed In: Carrollton, Texas, USA

Sizing Chart:

Please check our sizing chart before you order.

Sales Stats

Speed to First Woot:
1m 34.669s
First Sucker:
eVil
Last Wooter to Woot:
Noo666

Purchaser Experience

  • 0% first woot
  • 95% second woot
  • 5% < 10 woots
  • 0% < 25 woots
  • 0% ≥ 25 woots

Purchaser Seniority

  • 10% joined today
  • 1% one week old
  • 2% one month old
  • 14% one year old
  • 73% > one year old

Quantity Breakdown

  • 95% bought 1
  • 4% bought 2
  • 1% bought 3 or more

Percentage of Sales Per Hour

6%
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4%
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5%
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7%
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3%
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4%
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12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

Percentage of Sales Per Day

5%
5%
5%
4%
71%
5%
4%
Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat Sun

Woots by State

zero wooters wootinglots of wooters wooting

Top Comments

What are Top Comments?

Top Comments are discussion forum posts we have deemed worthy of your time. Listen, we get a lot of comments, and most of the time, it's pretty forgettable stuff; but sometimes you rise to the top like butterfat in milk. We don't recommend you base your self-worth on how often we feature your comments, but we don't expressly forbid it either.

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Death Cares About Life by harantula
$15.00 In Stock Apparel & Accessories
$15.00 USD false 1 Retail EA
1 15
Woot! Shirt.Woot
4121 International Pkwy Carollton TX 75007 U.S.A.