Yeah, first year sucks, but stick with it, because it gets better.

No, we’re not saying it’s fun to do all the post-battle clean up, but you guys just started, okay? When Daredevil or Batman kick in the door… yeah, exactly, you ain’t ready for them yet. Which means you’ve got two choices. You can be on Lambda Team, run straight at whoever’s standing there and get beat like a morning omelet, or you can be on Team Panther and do all the odd jobs as you learn the basics.

But don’t think it’s all for nothing! Ralph over there with the broom, he’s actually learning quarterstaff techniques. And Billy’s picking up proper kung-fu stances. Or at least, he should be. LOWER THE KNEES A BIT, BILLY. THERE YOU GO, GOOD JOB. Trust me, all the best ninja start this way. Well, okay, that’s not true, the BEST ninja learn on their own and then break in at two in the morning and fight for control of the dojo, but that only illustrates why we need men like you to help clean up after.

Incidentally, we’ve got a new Ninja Lord this morning, some sixteen year old kid that defeated our old Master. He’s still trying to learn everyone’s names so bear with him. If you see him walking around, say hi!

Wear this shirt: on your first day.

Don’t wear this shirt: if you’re a pirate. Shows a lack of character.

This shirt tells the world: “Every career has entry-level positions.”

We call this color: Brown Belt

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