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e-maul

by Paul Hornschemeier

$15.00
$18.00 17% off List Price

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Welcome!

You’ve got mai-AUAUAAAAAAAAAAGGHG!

Greetings/Salutations,

I am writing to you as you are the one I can trust. I am a lawyer work for the Ursine Embassy of Yosemite National Park. I have a matter that which is of the utmost importance to you for which I wish to discuss. I trust your secrecy in these important matters.

Recently my client and his entire family were killed most tragically when their plane descended into mountains uncontrollably. Due to no survivors being located I have contacted you. My client left considerable fortune of wealth with no instruction as to whom with to leave it. If you will help me I will ensure your generous reward.

A total of $75 million currently sits in an unmarked safe deposit box at the foot of a tall oak tree in the park. However if Ursine officials are alerted to its presence the consequences will be resulting in complete loss of this fortune. I am proposing that you would take this moneys into your bank account until such time as I could secure an offshore account. At which time you would relinquish the funds to me minus your 12% fee of course.

If this arrangement is acceptable to you please to be emailing me with a time at which we can meet in Yosemite National Park near the rocky outcropping. So I can identify you please bring a large bag full of honey, berries, and sugary snack foods such as Twinkies. You may also want to rub the berries all over your skin as this will make you easy to consume identify.

Thanking you in advance for your service and confidentiality in this matter,

A. Hugh Hungribare, Esq

Wear this shirt: While pounding out your latest manifesto against us in the forums.

Don’t wear this shirt: Around your grandma. You’re going to have to explain the whole thing and it’s going to really kill the joke.

This shirt tells the world: “Some things even McAfee can’t protect you from.”

We call this color: Web and Grassic Design

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Features

Pantone Colors:
White - 4685C - 4735C- 3105C - 4635C - Black

Features:
• Fiber Content: 4.5 oz 100% Combed Ringspun Cotton
• Manufactured In: Honduras/Nicaragua
• Printed In Carrollton, Texas, USA
• These shirts are printed to order. That means most of the time, we'll be printing using DTG technology

Sizing Chart:
Please check our sizing chart before you order.

Sales Stats

Speed to First Woot:
1m 2.000s
First Sucker:
NicksVideo
Last Wooter to Woot:
xdaze

Purchaser Experience

  • 0% first woot
  • 95% second woot
  • 5% < 10 woots
  • 0% < 25 woots
  • 0% ≥ 25 woots

Purchaser Seniority

  • 12% joined today
  • 1% one week old
  • 4% one month old
  • 24% one year old
  • 59% > one year old

Quantity Breakdown

  • 95% bought 1
  • 5% bought 2
  • 1% bought 3 or more

Percentage of Sales Per Hour

11%
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6%
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7%
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12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

Percentage of Sales Per Day

1%
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89%
3%
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Woots by State

zero wooters wootinglots of wooters wooting

Top Comments

What are Top Comments?

Top Comments are discussion forum posts we have deemed worthy of your time. Listen, we get a lot of comments, and most of the time, it's pretty forgettable stuff; but sometimes you rise to the top like butterfat in milk. We don't recommend you base your self-worth on how often we feature your comments, but we don't expressly forbid it either.

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e-maul by Paul Hornschemeier
$15.00 In Stock Apparel & Accessories
$15.00 USD false 1 Retail EA
1 15
Woot! Shirt.Woot
4121 International Pkwy Carollton TX 75007 U.S.A.