Harvest Traditions

by patrickspens


Printed to order

Ships in 1-2 business days.

Limit 15 per customer
  • Standard - Estimated delivery Jul 10 - Jul 13
  • Two-Day - Estimated delivery Jul 06
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The first one is the harvest

1st place in Derby #113: Harvest, with 1274 votes!

“I know how you feel, son. You don’t want to do it, I understand, I really do. I remember when I was your age, and my old man took me out for my first day on the job. And boy, my old man—well, you remember Grampa, right? He was… well, he was from a different generation. He was tough to please, you know?

“But sometimes I think I needed that. He was hard on me. Really hard on me. Nothing was ever good enough for him. I had to grow up fast, son. I had to be a man, maybe before I was ready. But I learned. I toughened up. I didn’t have it easy, but in a way I think that was his gift to me.

“Because see, the world is not easy. You have to grit your teeth and bear it, son. And you have to do things sometimes—a lot of the time, really—that you don’t like. Look at this turtle. You don’t have anything against this turtle. I don’t have anything against this turtle. This turtle doesn’t deserve what’s coming to it. But it’s coming. That’s just how it is. That’s what we do. That’s what we have to do. It’s what you’re going to have to do.

“I wonder if I didn’t make things harder for you by trying to let you be a kid, the way your Grampa never let me be a kid. You’re sensitive. I couldn’t be like that when I was your age. And I wonder if that’s going to make this tougher for you. I wonder if, in a perverse sort of way, your Grampa’s severity with me… I wonder if that was a mercy he did me. Miserable old, hateful, hard-hearted, brutal bastard that he was.”


“Yeah, son?”

“Whatever happened to Grampa, anyway?”

“Ha! Ha! Oh, that’s a funny story! ...Uh, maybe for another time.”

Wear this shirt: to remind everyone around you that our time on this planet is fleeting, and life is fragile.

Don’t wear this shirt: to your job at Hospice, you sick freak.

This shirt tells the world: “Just call me la petite Morty.”

We call this color: Baby Culler Navy Color

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Pantone Colors:
BlackC - 5753C - 405C- 454C - 440C - 561C

Standard Brand:

  • Standard fit (slightly boxy, a little loose)
  • Fiber Content: 4.5 oz 100% Combed Ringspun Cotton
  • Manufactured In: Honduras/Nicaragua
  • Printed In: Carrollton, Texas, USA

Premium Brand:

  • Slimmer fit (if you like a looser fit, order one size up from your usual size)
  • Fiber Content: 4.2 oz 100% Combed Ringspun Cotton
  • Manufactured In: USA, Central America, Vietnam or Bangladesh
  • Printed In: Carrollton, Texas, USA

Sizing Chart:

Please check our sizing chart before you order.

Sales Stats

Speed to First Woot:
0m 56.000s
First Sucker:
Last Wooter to Woot:

Purchaser Experience

  • 0% first woot
  • 95% second woot
  • 5% < 10 woots
  • 0% < 25 woots
  • 0% ≥ 25 woots

Purchaser Seniority

  • 7% joined today
  • 1% one week old
  • 5% one month old
  • 36% one year old
  • 51% > one year old

Quantity Breakdown

  • 95% bought 1
  • 5% bought 2
  • 1% bought 3 or more

Percentage of Sales Per Hour

12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

Percentage of Sales Per Day

Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat Sun

Woots by State

zero wooters wootinglots of wooters wooting

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Harvest Traditions by patrickspens
$11.00 In Stock Apparel & Accessories
$11.00 $14.00 USD false 1 Retail EA
1 15
Woot! Shirt.Woot
4121 International Pkwy Carollton TX 75007 U.S.A.