If Only There Was An Obvious Name...

by Mathjis Vissers a.k.a. Dementedhero


Printed to order

Ships in 1-2 business days.

Limit 15 per customer
  • Standard - Estimated delivery Jun 08 - Jun 13
  • Two-Day - Estimated delivery Jun 06
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We’re Already Looking Into A Toy Licensing Deal

It was supposed to be a simple worldwide boy band tour. The Kids From The New Block and The Interstate Boys, together at last. A million uteri synching as one in adoration. Tickets sold out in less than a minute.

But then, tragedy. The plane went down over Egypt. Trapped in the desert, Ronnie and Dan used their knowledge of geography to lead their friends through the desert. When the sandstorm got too rough, they ran towards the ancient pyramid that appeared as though by magic! Inside, the singers found a glowing blue crystal. When Dustin touched it, it released a strange energy that turned them all into powerful beasts.

The Wolf with his cunning! The Gorilla with his ferocity! The Lion with his charm! The T-Rex with his intimidation! The Lesser Wooded Vole with his steady supply of plague fleas! These powers and more went to the young singers, who instantly pledged to use them for good since they were already rich and had tons of women.

Now the tour continues, and fans everywhere line up again and again. But any time the evil of Dr. Von Pussycat and the Army Of Puppykeets show their adorable paws, the singers spring into action… as ROAR!

This shirt was designed by: Mathjis Vissers a.k.a. Dementedhero. He has a great future in movie posters if the animalsploitation genre ever comes back. You can do your part by buying a pound of catnip and filming the results.

Wear this shirt: when you go to bars. Predators make good breeding stock. Even vegans know this. You say “wow, I never considered going all celery before, but you make me think so differently!” and you suddenly get like a million times hotter. Plus it’s real easy to hide a cheeseburger in your coat. They’ll never know.

Don’t wear this shirt: if you think it makes you a wild creature and somehow gives you the right to go to a website we are joking around with and start posting “w00t ownz u” and “u suxorz n ihop u die”. We appreciate the brand loyalty but please, be nice to our interneighbors. And IHOP.

This shirt tells the world: “I can tell by your eyes. You saw this shirt and you’re assuming I can transform. I understand why you’d think that. But it isn’t true.”

We call this color: Bad Bad T-Shirt Brown, Baddest Shirt In The Whole Dang Town, But That’s Not Old King Kong, That’s Just Some Other Public Domain Gorilla

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Pantone Colors:
600C - 617C - 4655C - 731C - Cool Gray 7C - Cool Gray 11C - 198C

Standard Brand:

  • Standard fit (slightly boxy, a little loose)
  • Fiber Content: 4.5 oz 100% Combed Ringspun Cotton
  • Manufactured In: Honduras/Nicaragua
  • Printed In: Carrollton, Texas, USA

Premium Brand:

  • Slimmer fit (if you like a looser fit, order one size up from your usual size)
  • Fiber Content: 4.2 oz 100% Combed Ringspun Cotton
  • Manufactured In: USA, Central America, Vietnam or Bangladesh
  • Printed In: Carrollton, Texas, USA

Sizing Chart:

Please check our sizing chart before you order.

Sales Stats

Speed to First Woot:
0m 19.000s
First Sucker:
Last Wooter to Woot:

Purchaser Experience

  • 0% first woot
  • 95% second woot
  • 5% < 10 woots
  • 0% < 25 woots
  • 0% ≥ 25 woots

Purchaser Seniority

  • 11% joined today
  • 2% one week old
  • 4% one month old
  • 41% one year old
  • 41% > one year old

Quantity Breakdown

  • 95% bought 1
  • 4% bought 2
  • 1% bought 3 or more

Percentage of Sales Per Hour

12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

Percentage of Sales Per Day

Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat Sun

Woots by State

zero wooters wootinglots of wooters wooting

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Top Comments are discussion forum posts we have deemed worthy of your time. Listen, we get a lot of comments, and most of the time, it's pretty forgettable stuff; but sometimes you rise to the top like butterfat in milk. We don't recommend you base your self-worth on how often we feature your comments, but we don't expressly forbid it either.

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    wootbot Got something of value to say? You'd be the first. Somebody, anybody, give us a quality post. We're dying here.

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If Only There Was An Obvious Name... by Mathjis Vissers a.k.a. Dementedhero
$11.00 In Stock Apparel & Accessories
$11.00 $14.00 USD false 1 Retail EA
1 15
Woot! Shirt.Woot
4121 International Pkwy Carollton TX 75007 U.S.A.