To defend their town, these inventive soldiers are prepared to rend the very fabric of history itself. The rampaging invaders are reduced to formless squiggles on the two-dimensional ground by this boldly Brechtian strategem. The only wall that will be breached this day is the fourth wall! It's a rare lighthearted moment in early medieval life, which was otherwise occupied mostly by boiling witches, dumping chamber pots, and dying of plague.

This shirt was designed by: Ian Leino, an independent graphic designer and illustrator based in Asheville, NC whose work has appeared on t-shirt sites like Threadless and at retailers like Hot Topic. He's done work for The Doors, KISS, and Green Day - so if you hire him, you'll be a couple of degrees closer to Gene Simmons.

Wear this shirt to: cheer on your local Battle of Hastings re-enactors.

Don’t wear this shirt to: museums specializing in early European fabric art, unless you want to wind up on the restoration table.

This shirt tells the world: "What's that? You want to invade my town? Good luck with no leg!"

We call this color: Meta-Cream.

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