It Took 65 Million Years to Eat You

by BootsBoots

$15.00
$18.00 17% off List Price

Printed to order.

Ships in 3-5 business days

Kelly Green
New
Limit 15 per customer
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Chicken Ala Darwin

3rd place in Derby #89: Dinosaurs, with 836 votes!

Ingredients:
One thousand large dinosaurs
20,000 humans
Various predators and misfortunes and dangers
Egg timer
Large Saucepan

Place the large dinosaurs in the saucepan, full of the misfortunes, dangers and predators. Let dinosaurs simmer uncovered for exactly twenty five million years. Stir. You should see a reduction in dinosaur size, and notice around half the dinosaurs are gone.

Cover the dinosaurs and let simmer for an additional thirty five million years. Check the dinosaurs again. The few that remain should appear smaller and somewhat greenish-white. Add the humans and stir. Let sit for five million years.

You should notice that all the humans have left to populate the stars after a war with their android slaves, leaving behind mysterious artifacts, strange writings, and a few stragglers that think their civilization is only a few thousand years old. Pour them into a glass to dispose of later. The one remaining dinosaur will be white with feathers and seem really stupid. Consume. Serves 1-2.

Wear this shirt: to show the host or hostess that you can be very patient when dinner is running a little late.

Don’t wear this shirt: when you’re delivering pizzas in thirty minutes or less.

This shirt tells the world: “Wait long enough by the river and the body of your enemy will float by.”

We call this color: Once said a young lady named Jean/
To a boy with his own time machine/I’ll let you come over/When hell freezes over/So he called on her descendant, Kelly Green

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Features

Pantone Colors:
White - 7500C - 144C 375C - 377C - 364C

Features:
• Fiber Content: 4.5 oz 100% Combed Ringspun Cotton
• Manufactured In: Honduras/Nicaragua
• Printed In Carrollton, Texas, USA
• These shirts are printed to order. That means most of the time, we'll be printing using DTG technology

Sizing Chart:
Please check our sizing chart before you order.

Sales Stats

Speed to First Woot:
0m 8.000s
First Sucker:
mixer23
Last Wooter to Woot:
beardrivecar

Purchaser Experience

  • 0% first woot
  • 94% second woot
  • 6% < 10 woots
  • 0% < 25 woots
  • 0% ≥ 25 woots

Purchaser Seniority

  • 8% joined today
  • 2% one week old
  • 7% one month old
  • 41% one year old
  • 42% > one year old

Quantity Breakdown

  • 94% bought 1
  • 6% bought 2
  • 1% bought 3 or more

Percentage of Sales Per Hour

19%
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5%
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6%
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12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

Percentage of Sales Per Day

1%
1%
1%
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96%
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Woots by State

zero wooters wootinglots of wooters wooting

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It Took 65 Million Years to Eat You by BootsBoots
$15.00 In Stock Apparel & Accessories
$15.00 USD false 1 Retail EA
1 15
Woot! Shirt.Woot
4121 International Pkwy Carollton TX 75007 U.S.A.