Loss

by lokklyn

$15.00
$18.00 17% off List Price

Printed to order.

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He Only Had Two Days Until Retirement

Louie was a good carp. One of the finest I’ve ever known.

3rd place in Derby #81: Heartbreak, with 741 votes!

They say fish like me grow to the size of their environment. But Louie, Louie was always the right size for anywhere. Me and Louie went to school together. We were partners. The day that fungus swept through the tank, he looked after me. The day the glass broke and all the water ran out, I looked after him. I said “if you weren’t around, Louie, I’d never make it outta my door in the morning!” And then we’d laugh. But now he ain’t around.

Louie took care of his family, though. He left them that little treasure chest that opens and closes, and that plastic pirate skeleton to keep his family safe at night. He was saving up to buy a ceramic castle for his “golden years”. I guess that won’t ever happen now.

I remember just last week me and Louie were joking around with a packet of wasabi. Maybe that was bad luck or something, I dunno. All I know is, whoever did this was an expert. Someone with access to avocado and rice. And there aren’t a lot of people out there like that. Whoever you are, you better watch out. Because this planet is mostly water. And if you so much as step into a bathtub, you’re mine.

Wear this shirt: when you’ve decided to commit seppuku. It’d be kinda neat to see if you can get all the shapes before you die.

Don’t wear this shirt: when you’re in a knife fight. it won’t help you to have an easy diagram of the best places to cut right there on your chest.

This shirt tells the world: “No tears. He died a warrior’s death. K’plah.”

We call this color: Mrs. Brown You’ve Got A Lovely Otter. Did you know otters eat raw fish? If you didn’t, we’ve saved you from having to post “why is that funny?” on our forums.

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Features

Pantone Colors:
White - 151C - 032C- 362C - 2925C - Black

Features:
• Fiber Content: 4.5 oz 100% Combed Ringspun Cotton
• Manufactured In: Honduras/Nicaragua
• Printed In Carrollton, Texas, USA
• These shirts are printed to order. That means most of the time, we'll be printing using DTG technology

Sizing Chart:
Please check our sizing chart before you order.

Sales Stats

Speed to First Woot:
0m 5.000s
First Sucker:
Leahbh
Last Wooter to Woot:
mepeck

Purchaser Experience

  • 0% first woot
  • 92% second woot
  • 8% < 10 woots
  • 0% < 25 woots
  • 0% ≥ 25 woots

Purchaser Seniority

  • 9% joined today
  • 2% one week old
  • 5% one month old
  • 37% one year old
  • 47% > one year old

Quantity Breakdown

  • 92% bought 1
  • 7% bought 2
  • 1% bought 3 or more

Percentage of Sales Per Hour

18%
8%
5%
3%
1%
2%
2%
2%
4%
4%
5%
5%
5%
4%
4%
4%
3%
3%
3%
3%
3%
4%
3%
4%
12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

Percentage of Sales Per Day

2%
1%
2%
2%
2%
1%
89%
Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat Sun

Woots by State

zero wooters wootinglots of wooters wooting

Top Comments

What are Top Comments?

Top Comments are discussion forum posts we have deemed worthy of your time. Listen, we get a lot of comments, and most of the time, it's pretty forgettable stuff; but sometimes you rise to the top like butterfat in milk. We don't recommend you base your self-worth on how often we feature your comments, but we don't expressly forbid it either.

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Loss by lokklyn
$15.00 In Stock Apparel & Accessories
$15.00 USD false 1 Retail EA
1 15
Woot! Shirt.Woot
4121 International Pkwy Carollton TX 75007 U.S.A.