McSsection

by Glen Brogan

$15.00
$18.00 17% off List Price

Printed to order.

Ships in 3-5 business days

Baby Blue
New
Limit 15 per customer
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1 in 2 child mascots is obese.

Tonight on TLC: one giant purple thing’s story.

This is G. His name has been altered to protect his identity. Yes, we said that unironically, as if you wouldn’t be able to spot a 6-foot-tall purple gumdrop in his small Midwestern hometown.

“I was always kind of a husky kid. I played sports and all, but I definitely liked video games more. And my parents enforced a strict limit of two sodas a day.”

G weighs over 540 pounds. He is only 25, but suffers from hypertension, Type II Diabetes, elevated cholesterol, gallstones, Gout, sleep apnea, and has recently suffered a mild heart attack.

“It’s really scary; all I could think about was how they would have to knock down the wall to get me out. I realized then that I needed help to change my life around.”

That’s when G contacted doctors at Brentwood Hospital with a plea for help.

“The email was nearly unintelligible. Come to find out, his fingers were too large to properly operate a keyboard.”

Dr. Nathaniel Morrow and his colleagues immediately went to work devising a weight loss plan for G. They focused on reducing the amount of calories G takes in and increasing his physical activity to burn more calories than he takes in, because this is the only thing that actually causes healthy weight loss. Seriously. Pills, special meals, and energy drinks don’t. If you really want to lose weight, eat a little less and move a lot more. Also, eat more vegetables than anything else.

Unfortunately, G began suffering chest pains, which led doctors to recommend a bypass surgery. When they opened G up on the operating table, they were shocked at what they saw.

“He had literally become what he was eating. And what he was eating was total crap.”

Wear this shirt: To the gym. Everyone will smile knowingly.

Don’t wear this shirt: To a Burger King. Those guys are uptight about competition.

This shirt tells the world: “I’m not CRYING on the inside. I said ‘DYING.’”

We call this color: Baby Blue Cheese

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Features

Pantone Colors:
7506C - 135C - 7510C- Warm Red C 2583C - 669C

Features:
• Fiber Content: 4.5 oz 100% Combed Ringspun Cotton
• Manufactured In: Honduras/Nicaragua
• Printed In Carrollton, Texas, USA
• These shirts are printed to order. That means most of the time, we'll be printing using DTG technology

Sizing Chart:
Please check our sizing chart before you order.

Sales Stats

Speed to First Woot:
0m 13.000s
First Sucker:
Xihix
Last Wooter to Woot:
benlin

Purchaser Experience

  • 0% first woot
  • 92% second woot
  • 8% < 10 woots
  • 0% < 25 woots
  • 0% ≥ 25 woots

Purchaser Seniority

  • 11% joined today
  • 1% one week old
  • 4% one month old
  • 31% one year old
  • 54% > one year old

Quantity Breakdown

  • 92% bought 1
  • 6% bought 2
  • 2% bought 3 or more

Percentage of Sales Per Hour

11%
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6%
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12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

Percentage of Sales Per Day

1%
87%
6%
2%
2%
1%
1%
Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat Sun

Woots by State

zero wooters wootinglots of wooters wooting

Top Comments

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Top Comments are discussion forum posts we have deemed worthy of your time. Listen, we get a lot of comments, and most of the time, it's pretty forgettable stuff; but sometimes you rise to the top like butterfat in milk. We don't recommend you base your self-worth on how often we feature your comments, but we don't expressly forbid it either.

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McSsection by Glen Brogan
$15.00 In Stock Apparel & Accessories
$15.00 USD false 1 Retail EA
1 15
Woot! Shirt.Woot
4121 International Pkwy Carollton TX 75007 U.S.A.