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Mid-Act Three Conflict

by Chow Hon Lam

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Singing In The Dead Of Night

Quoth the raven, “Not so fast, Senator Valducci.”

You? You dare? You dare come here? You dare come here and confront me? You dare come here and confront me in this place? You dare come here and confront me in this place in front of my family? I thought we’d finished you.

But no matter. You’re just one bird. You can’t stop me. You can’t stop what I have planned. Which, incidentally, is a far reaching plan to take over this entire planet by using the recording industry to sue their customers so that the underground will embrace the various high-quality downloadable files I’ve made of my birdsong and play them constantly in bars, record stores and coffee shops, giving me a legal basis to claim everything as my territory under avian law. Here are some documents, in fact, proving everything I just said. I’m not scared of you seeing them because, as I said, you’re just one bird and you can’t stop me.

Okay, boys. I’m gonna get in this helicopter and go to my meeting with the recording industry. You go ahead and mow him down with your powerful machine guns which he couldn’t possibly dodge by going left, right or up. I’m sure he can’t escape, no matter how many times he’s done it before. Oh, and attach this extra long easy-to-grab cable to the bottom of my helicopter, too. No reason, I just think it looks cool.

Wear this shirt: with other people wearing this shirt. Then call the police and report a murder. Then tell them, technically, more than one crow is called a murder and grin smugly. The bruises will probably heal and a good lawyer should be able to get you some money!

Don’t wear this shirt: and think it will give you mystical Ghost Dance powers or something. It’s just a freakin’ shirt.

This shirt tells the world: “You broke the cardinal rule.”

We call this color: E-Lemon-ate Him… For Good.

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Pantone Colors:
White - 123C - 7510C- 5415C - 7497C - 7546C- Black

Standard Brand:

  • Standard fit (slightly boxy, a little loose)
  • Fiber Content: 4.5 oz 100% Combed Ringspun Cotton
  • Manufactured In: Honduras/Nicaragua
  • Printed In: Carrollton, Texas, USA

American Apparel:

  • Slimmer fit (if you like a looser fit, order one size up from your usual size)
  • Fiber Content: 4.3 oz 100% Combed Ringspun Cotton
  • Manufactured In: USA
  • Printed In: Carrollton, Texas, USA

Sizing Chart:
Please check our sizing chart before you order.

Sales Stats

Speed to First Woot:
1m 3.000s
First Sucker:
Last Wooter to Woot:

Purchaser Experience

  • 0% first woot
  • 97% second woot
  • 3% < 10 woots
  • 0% < 25 woots
  • 0% ≥ 25 woots

Purchaser Seniority

  • 13% joined today
  • 2% one week old
  • 6% one month old
  • 33% one year old
  • 47% > one year old

Quantity Breakdown

  • 97% bought 1
  • 2% bought 2
  • 0% bought 3 or more

Percentage of Sales Per Hour

12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

Percentage of Sales Per Day

Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat Sun

Woots by State

zero wooters wootinglots of wooters wooting

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Mid-Act Three Conflict by Chow Hon Lam
$11.00 In Stock Apparel & Accessories
$11.00 $14.00 USD false 1 Retail EA
1 15
Woot! Shirt.Woot
4121 International Pkwy Carollton TX 75007 U.S.A.