Seven Finger Discount

by Reilly Stroope


Printed to order

Ships in 1-2 business days.

Limit 15 per customer
  • Standard - Estimated delivery Jul 06 - Jul 11
  • Two-Day - Estimated delivery Jul 03
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Magneto Was Right

This meeting of the Brotherhood of Oklahoma Mutants is now in session.

Friends, welcome. Too long have we known the tyranny of the “mundanes” that refuse to admit our genetic superiority. Larry, remember when that short order cook made fun of your long ears? Truly, if this were the comic books, we would have crushed him that day! But as it stands we just put the tip under a glass of water turned upside down. Even still, our name means fear!

It is our duty, my friends, to gather our people and stand as one. To put our six fingered hands and ten toed webbed feet together… okay, not literally, Hank, don’t hurt yourself… and be an inspiration to those who would fear and destroy our culture! What culture? Well… I wrote a song about Captain Picard meeting King Arthur. And Donna has a really cool fanfic about Angel going to the North Pole and falling in love with Rudolph. Who’s to say what culture really is, anyway? Incidentally, Donna, you can’t wear that deer costume to meetings anymore. No, I’m pretty sure that “the need to dress like a deer” is not a “brain mutation”. Donna, we’re not… we’re not debating this. Can I get on with my speech? Can I get on with my speech, please?

So know this: all of you in the Brotherhood of Oklahoma Mutants are under my protection. Whenever you receive substandard hash browns, I will be there. Whenever you are overcharged for the additional undercoating, I will be there. Whenever you are moved to tears over the thought of spending one more winter without a nice pair of gloves, I will be there. And may God have mercy on those who stand in our way.

Today, Oklahoma! Tomorrow, the world!

Wear this shirt: if men call you… HEXIPOKE! And don’t even start being ignorant about that prefix because you don’t poke with the thumb at all and we’re right.

Don’t wear this shirt: if you’re a coffin-shaped evil time-travelling robot from a deadly future who also happens to be neon pink. We miss you, Nimrod. You were the best.

This shirt tells the world: “Hand me a guitar, jerkface, and get ready to shut up.”

We call this color: Skinny Black Genes

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Pantone Colors:
White 7403C- Cool Gray 1C

Standard Brand:

  • Standard fit (slightly boxy, a little loose)
  • Fiber Content: 4.5 oz 100% Combed Ringspun Cotton
  • Manufactured In: Honduras/Nicaragua
  • Printed In: Carrollton, Texas, USA

Premium Brand:

  • Slimmer fit (if you like a looser fit, order one size up from your usual size)
  • Fiber Content: 4.2 oz 100% Combed Ringspun Cotton
  • Manufactured In: USA, Central America, Vietnam or Bangladesh
  • Printed In: Carrollton, Texas, USA

Sizing Chart:

Please check our sizing chart before you order.

Sales Stats

Speed to First Woot:
0m 25.000s
First Sucker:
Last Wooter to Woot:

Purchaser Experience

  • 0% first woot
  • 91% second woot
  • 9% < 10 woots
  • 0% < 25 woots
  • 0% ≥ 25 woots

Purchaser Seniority

  • 7% joined today
  • 1% one week old
  • 4% one month old
  • 44% one year old
  • 44% > one year old

Quantity Breakdown

  • 91% bought 1
  • 8% bought 2
  • 1% bought 3 or more

Percentage of Sales Per Hour

12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

Percentage of Sales Per Day

Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat Sun

Woots by State

zero wooters wootinglots of wooters wooting

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Seven Finger Discount by Reilly Stroope
$11.00 In Stock Apparel & Accessories
$11.00 $14.00 USD false 1 Retail EA
1 15
Woot! Shirt.Woot
4121 International Pkwy Carollton TX 75007 U.S.A.