They were the biggest cartoon sensations in America, and every kid knew their names. But it all came crashing to an ugly ending that even Todd Bridges and Tracey Gold couldn’t have survived.

When the Norwegian Parliament controversially lifted the ban on fishing cartoon sea creatures in 2009, it was only a matter of time before Japan and Iceland followed suit. The result was a catastrophic depletion of the planet’s cartoon-aquatic-life stocks. Major TV and movie studios were forced to attempt animated krill and cartoon barnacles, but those proved poor substitutes for the once-abundant wisecracking ocean animals. The era when cartoon fish, molluscs, and cephalopods ruled the airwaves was over.

Wear this shirt: if you enjoy answering uncomfortable questions from children.

Don’t wear this shirt: if you’re a cartoon vegetarian.

This shirt tells the world: “Sorry, Charlie. And Bob. And Marlon. And Eugene. And…”

We call this color: Blue Tide.

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