This isn’t just a t-shirt – it’s a deeply revealing psychological tool. Sit calmly in a quiet room, take a long look at the image above, and answer the following questions as honestly as possible…

1. The large Japanese character represents:
a) health
b) loneliness
c) blood

2. The smaller Japanese characters say:
a) “Absolutely amazing!”
b) “Help me, I’m suffering.”
c) “It is the duty of the strong to cleanse the world of the weak.”

3. The deer in the picture is:
a) enjoying flowers on a lovely afternoon
b) trapped in a world of endless pain
c) delicious

4. The rock formation on the right of the picture makes you feel:
a) awed by nature’s infinite variety
b) like writing in your poetry journal
c) respectful of its power, yet jealous of its rigidity and size

If you answered mostly A: click that big I Want One button up there as soon as you finish reading the rest of this comedy gem.

If you answered mostly B: take steps now to meet more people and get involved in your community before you wind up buying a ferret or something.

If you answered mostly C: stay away from our families.

Wear this shirt: because you live in the West and wearing Japanese characters on our clothes is just what we do. No big whoop. They do the reverse over in Japan.

Don’t wear this shirt: to, like, your local Japanese Festival or sushi bar or something. That’s just too much. Exception: if normally you’d be wearing a kimono. Then this shirt is a step in the right direction. Other exception: if you live in Japan.

This shirt tells the world: “Zettai ni odoroku hodono shika.”

We call this color: Land of the Rising Asphalt.

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