Who will ninja the ninjas?

Ninjas like the Unstealthiest Ninja put those of us who serve on the Commission of Ninjaiary Quality Control in a difficult position.

On the one hand, his antics serve to hurt our reputation. "You're in charge of assuring each ninja's competence," people say. "How do you expect to be taken seriously with a ninja like that wandering around, making a fool not just of himself, not just of you, but of all ninjas everywhere?" Those who voice these complaints are not wrong. The problem is exacerbated more by the fact that the quality most common to good ninjas is stealth. Thus, the Unstealthiest Ninja stands out not only for his idiocy but also due to the fact that the average person will never see a good ninja at work, because the trademark of a good ninja is cunning and stealth.

But then again, the other quality most associated with the ninja is decisiveness. A ninja isn't wishy-washy. A ninja doesn't get into the middle of a battle and then think, "wait, did I make the wrong decision here?" And so we, the Commission ot Ninjaiary Quality Control, find ourselves in an awkward position between two sub-par and certainly reputation-damaging options: allow the Unstealthiest Ninja to stay and appear incompetant ourselves; or dismiss him and risk seeming flighty. Either way, we don't come out looking great.

Really, there's only one thing we can hope for: that the Unstealthiest Ninja will take our criticism seriously and lay low for however long it takes to reaquaint himself with the art of being a ninja, an art he was once acquainted with when we first let him into our exclusive society.

Wait, what's that? Photos of a party have surfaced? They're all over the internet? It's bad? Well, crap.

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