Who Wants to Live Forever?

by Julia Sonmi Heglund

$15.00
$18.00 17% off List Price
Will not arrive before December 25th
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Tie Your Monster Down

You’ll have to provide your own guitar solo

Is this a graveyard? Is this a castle lab?
So many pieces that those other people had
Sewed them one by one, a new sort of son he’d be
I called for Igor, he brought a brain to me
Because Prometheus
He will rise
Show them all
I was wise
They all thought me maaaad
I’ll show them who’s maaaad you seeee
Not meeee

Mummy
Just killed a man
Opened up the casket bed
He got cursed and now he’s dead
Mummy
His sarcophagus
Was comfortable and they took it away
Mummy
Ooooo oooooo
Didn’t really want to rise
But if they don’t put it back before tomorrow
they’re all gone
they’re all gone
And he will show no mercy

His job
Is never done
All his organs kept in brine, he’s made lots of overtime
Pharaoh was his buddy, his life-long bro
Said he’d stay awake and guard him in the tomb
Mummy
Ooooo ooooo
there aren’t even windows
He cannot ever die
He’ll sometimes wish he’d never signed on at all


Igor be ready with that switch in your hand
God’s domain, God’s domain, going where you should not go
Thunderbolt and lightning, the monster is rising, see!

Come here, Igor
Here’s your Igor
Help me, Igor
I’m your Igor
Igor, shut it help me pull
This circuit clo-o-o-osed

I’m just a wolf man nobody loves me
He’s just a wolf man, oh the humanity
Three days a month he will hunt you and me

Quake in fear, I am here, to collect my rent
Dracula, no! We will not pay your rent
Pay my rent!
Dracula! We will not pay your rent
Pay my rent!
Dracula! We will not pay your rent
Pay my rent!
Will not pay your rent!
Pay my rent!
Will not pay your rent!
Never pay my rent?
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

Master we flee-a have to flee-a they have pitchforks at the door
The villagers have come to kill the monsters weeee
That’s weeee
We beeeeeeee


So you hit me with lightning and bring me to life?
Left me scared and confused and now I’m the bad guy?
Ohhhh, monsters
Who are really the monsters
Technically us
Technically, sure, but you see


We’re just allegory
You watch vicariously
We’re just allegory
You’re all the true monsters
Not weeee


Note the clever ennnndiiiing
CRASSSSSSssssssssh

 

Wear this shirt: in a little bit bigger size than normal so it will hang down and cover your fat bottom.

Don’t wear this shirt: when you have mud on your face. It’d be a big disgrace.

This shirt tells the world: “Oh, yeah. Typical. The European monsters get all the credit. Meanwhile The Creature From The Black Lagoon has to take a waitressing job just to get by. And you think anyone offers royalties?”

We call this color: Crazy Little Thing Called Blackulove.

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Features

Pantone Colors:
Cool Gray 1C - 436C

Features:
• Fiber Content: 4.5 oz 100% Combed Ringspun Cotton
• Manufactured In: Honduras/Nicaragua
• Printed In Carrollton, Texas, USA
• These shirts are printed to order. That means most of the time, we'll be printing using DTG technology

Sizing Chart:
Please check our sizing chart before you order.

Sales Stats

Speed to First Woot:
1m 4.000s
First Sucker:
stageking21891
Last Wooter to Woot:
mrshh

Purchaser Experience

  • 0% first woot
  • 90% second woot
  • 10% < 10 woots
  • 0% < 25 woots
  • 0% ≥ 25 woots

Purchaser Seniority

  • 8% joined today
  • 1% one week old
  • 2% one month old
  • 28% one year old
  • 60% > one year old

Quantity Breakdown

  • 90% bought 1
  • 8% bought 2
  • 2% bought 3 or more

Percentage of Sales Per Hour

17%
7%
4%
2%
2%
3%
6%
8%
8%
8%
7%
5%
4%
4%
2%
4%
3%
3%
2%
0%
0%
1%
1%
0%
12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

Percentage of Sales Per Day

1%
2%
3%
90%
2%
1%
1%
Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat Sun

Woots by State

zero wooters wootinglots of wooters wooting

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Who Wants to Live Forever? by Julia Sonmi Heglund
$15.00 In Stock Apparel & Accessories
$15.00 USD false 1 Retail EA
1 15
Woot! Shirt.Woot
4121 International Pkwy Carollton TX 75007 U.S.A.