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by Laura Duncan

It’s all the pageantry of that other summer athletic event but without the poopy water.

Here’s how it’ll work:

This Derby launches at noon CT on 8/11. The Derbathlon will consist of three separate events. You’ll submit as many designs as you like to each category.


1. CONCEPT: Concept-based art about strength, endurance, accuracy, speed … that sort of thing. No pop culture and no "rings" visuals.

2. TECHNICAL: Designs based on actual art styles. Pointillism, single line, watercolor, cross-hatching. You get the idea. 

3. HUMOR: These will be about visual pun, wordplay, punchlines, parody. You know, jokes.



There will be a Gold, Silver and Bronze winner from each category, determined by vote count. These will all share the daily feature spot, which means we are selling three winning shirts form each category on each day.

Friday - 8/19: Gold, Silver and Bronze from the Concept category

Saturday - 8/20: Gold, Silver and Bronze from the Technical category

Sunday - 8/21: Gold, Silver and Bronze from the Humor category

Runners up and honorable mentions will run in an HM sale. No need to stick the landing.


Gold medal winners - the #1 vote getters in a category - will earn $1,000. The Silver and Bronze winners will not get the flat fee, but will earn a per shirt commission for all sales on the first day and beyond. You know how many banned substances you can buy with that kinda cash? There will also be actual tangible medals for the top designs. SOMETHING YOU CAN TOUCH.


Same as every other derby entry, EXCEPT YOU MUST TITLE YOUR DESIGN PROPERLY. If it’s a submission for the concept category, write CONCEPT: [design title]. If it’s a submission for the humor category, write HUMOR: [design title], If it’s a submission of the technical derby, put TECHNICAL: [design title]. But, like, instead of calling it “design title,” you’ll put the name of your design.

We can’t wait to see what you do. We’ll be over here mumbling into the wee hours like Bob Costas and Dan Patrick. Good luck!