1st place in Derby #660: What's Up, Beaches?

We were gonna catch that evil squid-octopus-thingy and see what it ate, but Mayor Larry Vaughn told us, "Look, fellas, let's be reasonable. This is not the time or the place, to perform, some, half-assed autopsy on a cephalopod. And I am not going to stand here, and see that thing cut open, and see that little Kintner boy spill out all over the dock!"