1st place in Derby #47: Home, with 690 votes!

A dark and lonely planet or a shade tree and a home you built yourself? It all depends on your perspective. Maybe it’s just the boathouse for The Little Prince, but if sci-fi television is any indication, there’s something dangerous and powerful down there and it doesn’t want to be disturbed.

Sure, we’d like to believe the place is friendly and picturesque, but this isn’t some Star Trek episode. And doesn’t the whole place look like it’s right next to the interplanetary river? It might look pretty, but those river folk aren’t to be trusted. So if you want to play Space Deliverance at John Crighton’s Bait Shack, you go right ahead. We’ll be back on the main route, looking for a Sheraton.

This shirt was designed by: kdeuce, who is clearly some sort of anti-matter Thomas Kinkade. Maybe it was an alternate universe. Maybe it was some imperfect duplicating ray. All we know is that he or she is here now. And, really, we’re happy to have him or her around. It’ll keep those other jerkfaces humble.

Wear this shirt: when you want those goldurn kids to get off your property and respect your solitude. You goldurn kids!

Don’t wear this shirt: if you’re trying to win first place in an ugly shirt competition. Because that would only work on opposite day! Yeah, think that one over, smarty pants.

This shirt tells the world: “As soon as the centrifugal forces cause those blowing leaves to coalesce into a small moon, the nights will be so romantic.”

We call this color: There One Was A Pilot Named Ray/Who Met NASA On Their Job Fair Day/He Went Up Into Space/Where He Was Replaced/By An Alien Colored Heather Gray

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