Oh dear, this is worse than I thought.
We’re gonna need more “No More Tangles.”
Honey, you’ve got to hold still. Okay, more important than that, stop screaming. Please, honey? I know, I know, it’s pretty distressing from my end, too. Rest assured I want nothing more than to evict the sea life from your hair. Yes, I see the starfish. Yes, I know its little feet feel gross but I’m more concerned with the crab due to the pinch risk.
Okay, he’s gone. Relax. I know, I’m going to get it all. Relax. This is no worse than that time we went camping and you found all those ticks on your head.
Oh stop freaking out! That was like a year ago!
Just stop thrashing around, okay? Look I told you part of swimming in the ocean means sharing the water with sea life. Sometimes you’re gonna bump into one another and freaking out does no good.
Okay, to be fair, your results seem to be a little atypical.
Wear this shirt: To your next big Festival of Salacia.
Don’t wear this shirt: Swimming. Just take your shirt off. We’re not judging. Besides, no one buys that “I don’t want a sunburn” line anyway.
This shirt tells the world: My Simpsons retcon is going to rock your socks off.
We call this color: Creme-Liner
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