There are lots of good reasons why your prospective special someone may not have returned your call.

For one thing, maybe his or her roommate is not good about taking down messages from the machine. Or maybe your number was garbled on the recording.

Maybe you should call again and enunciate really clearly this time. Not today, though. That would seem desperate. Give it a little while. Make it seem like you’ve got other stuff to do, and you haven’t been thinking about him or her in the interim, but something just reminded you. Like you ran into a mutual friend or something.

Maybe he or she is trapped under some heavy furniture. That happens sometimes! Maybe none of his or her other friends have noticed yet, and you could be the one who saves the day. Do you think you should go over there and check it out? Don’t go right up to the door and buzz; be discreet. Like, stake out the place from across the street, with binoculars. Wear a hoodie and a false mustache.

You know what? Maybe he or she has been away on a trip. No, not a romantic getaway trip with someone else. A trip back home to arrange a relative’s funeral. He or she is going to really need some comforting upon returning. Boy, will he or she be glad to hear your message! Your shoulder will be just the thing to lean on and cry.

Or maybe… I don’t know, it’s kind of far-fetched, but maybe he or she just doesn’t especially want to talk to y-

No, forget it; that’s ludicrous.

Wear this shirt: when you want answers (and can handle the truth).

Don’t wear this shirt: around telemarketers.

This shirt tells the world: “The beep: Wait for it.”

We Call This Color: Rotary Royal Blue

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