It’s all fun and games until someone gets their windpipe crushed by an unseen hand.

And so, in conclusion, we would just like to put everyone’s fears to rest by reassuring both you and the Emperor that there is absolutely no way someone would be able to take advantage of what has been referred to as “The Exhaust Port Problem”.

Now, moving on to the new designs for the all-terrain armored transport vehicles you requested, we in R&D feel that we have finally come upon we… snicker… think you’ll really like. Introducing a new transport for a new Empire!

Ha! You see? You see what we did here? With the symbols and the things and the design? Pretty clever, huh? It’s just that you’re so SERIOUS all the time, Lord V, and we all thought, “Let’s give the old man a chuckle!” ‘S funny, right? I tell you we had some of the Moff shooting blue milk out of their noses with this one.

What’s that thing you’re doing with your hand? The pinchy thi…

Wear this shirt: during “Celebrate The Empire (Or We’ll Destroy Your Planet)” Day.

Don’t wear this shirt: around any surviving members of Dack Ralter’s family.

This shirt tells the world: ”@Rebellion I’M IN YR BASE, KILLIN YR SHIELD GENERATORZ”

We call this color: The Asphalt Strikes Back

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