You can look at the chart if you want, but it will only frustrate you.

Look son, I been barberin’ in this town nigh on 45 years and I don’t need no uppity kid like you tellin’ me things about “feathered edges” and “Bieber bowls” and other nonsensical hooey.

Believe me, I know what I’m doin’. And what I’m doin’ is flat tops.

Sure you can call it whatever you want: a “mohawk,” a “fade,” a “Suave Pablo,” whatever. You’re gettin’ a flat top. If it was good enough for Johnny Unitas you can bet your ass it’s good enough for you.

Well complain all you want, but if you don’t like it you can go find some OTHER barbershop with haircuts for $7.

Wear this shirt: To your next appointment for a haircut. Just point!

Don’t wear this shirt: Pretty much anywhere else.

This shirt tells the world: “If it weren’t for the receding hairline I’d be pretty stylish.”

We call this color: Swhitey Todd

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